I do believe that the next six weeks are going to be reeeeeaaaaaalllllly long. Every other phrase from my boys' mouths seems to be "I want my Daddy!" Especially if they are displeased with whatever Mommy has said or done or denied them at that particular moment.
My response to "I want my Daddy" has become "Yeah, I want your Daddy, too." Which might sound callous, but it is the absolute truth. For different reasons, depending on when I say it. Many times that phrase includes the silent "Because maybe then I could escape your whining for a for a few minutes."
However most of the time, I am just thinking that I miss him. I am really, really not good at this single-mom thing. I know, I keep saying that. And, yes, I do feel a little guilty about him being over there. He didn't go remote because I MADE him go or anything. But he did go because we knew that it was the one sure way that we could get back to the one place where we knew that the kids and I would be happiest. We love this place and I would gladly stay here forever. But here is the catch. It isn't nearly as wonderful without him. He is such a wonderful daddy and our marriage is back in such a good place. It is just a little miserable around here alone. (She said, in the understatement of the decade.)
But in six weeks or so, we get him back for a little bit. He comes home for his mid-tour leave and we are all looking so forward to it. Only....I am almost dreading his departure in January almost as much as I am anticipating his arrival in December. I try to block it out, but it's impossible. The kids, especially the boys, don't really get what is up.
And why should they? Bug doesn't even really get where Daddy actually is or when he is coming home. Whenever we web-cam, he makes SD show him outside so that he can see that it is night there. When we drive by random buildings in town, he asks, "Is that Turkey? Is that where Daddy is?" Last week, we were sharing a little bag of Cheetos (an unheard of treat around here!) and Bug was telling me that when Daddy gets home, we can give him some too. Then he said, "When is Daddy coming home?" Similarly, Bear was wanting to walk to Sonic. I told him that Sonic was very far away. He asked, "Like Turkey?"
So really, to Bear and Bug, SD could be on the moon, or Mars or next door. He just isn't here.
And that is all that matters. So in January, I know I am going to be answering endless questions about why Daddy can't come home now and why we can't just drive to the airport to get him. Ugh. And after Christmas, there is the "long half" of this remote. How long until August?
So, SD? I miss you. We all miss you. And we love you and appreciate you and can't wait to see you. Oh, and TALK to you. This last trip with limited phone and internet contact has been yucky. Get back to Turkey where I can talk to you. Gotta love irony.