Meme meme meme..ME!

Any teenager can write a survey about their favorite class or their secret crush or how nice their car is that their parents paid for. This is the survey for the older crowd. (This has been in drafts forever, aren't you excited that I'm sharing?)


1. Do you have a college degree?
Yep. Bachelors in Human Development & Family Studies/Early Childhood - also got my teaching credentials. Yeah, that's right, I've got cred.(My inner teenager just sighed and said "Please don't.") AAANND...in May, I will have my Master's in Counseling (lord willing).

2. What was the amount of your last electric bill?
$73.89...not bad! Don't ask me what it was in August.

3. Do you have life insurance?
Yes, I do. I have no idea how much. Bought it before SugarPlum was born.

4. How many hours per week do you work?
Are we talking about getting PAID to work? Because that would be a big, fat NONE - I'm an intern. I'm getting experience. Now, as for the unpaid labor, I'm a mom & a graduate student. So, I'd say...about 300 hours a week, give or take.

5. Have you ever attended a Toastmasters event?
No. I respect those who do, just not my cuppa.

6. Favorite place to attend Happy Hour?
Oh, please. Did you see the answer to #4? When would I go to Happy Hour? (Okay, occasionally after class, a few of us would go to an Italian restaurant here & get a beer. But that's about as exciting as my life gets.)

7. How many miles is your commute to work each day (one way)?
Haha. Candyland isn't that big a place. It's about 4 miles from my house to the office. And then I drive to various clients homes, schools, daycares, CPS. Good times, my friend.

8. What time do you get up every morning for work?
I get the kids up at about 6:30. If there's no school and I don't have any clients, I drag myself out of bed around noonish.

9. What is your definition of sleeping in late?
When the kids start asking for supper.

10. Do you check your cholesterol on a yearly basis?
Yes, and given the amount of cream and butter and fat I cook with, my numbers are amazingly low. My doctor always compliments me. *blush*

11. How large was your first cellular phone?
HUGE. It was the kind that was corded and you carried it in a bag. Sexy!

12. Does your employer provide good health insurance?
Hmmmmm....well. given that I have no actual employer, no. That was part of the divorce settlement - three years of health insurance. And it doesn't suck, I must admit. However, we are coming up on that three year limit. This is why I MUST get a job as soon as I graduate. Obamacare scares me to death.

13. Did you use the internet to write a research paper?
Only in grad school. In high school & college I had to drag ass to the library and search thru index cards and microfiche and all that crap. Thank you Al Gore for the internets!

14. Have you attended a HS reunion?
I went to my 10 year reunion and had a blast. I planned to attend my 20, even paid the ridiculous amount for the dinner, and then didn't get to go. I'm still bitter. (And slightly horrified, realizing I've been out of high school over 25 years!)

15. How many jobs have you held in your professional career?
Three teaching/tutoring jobs. But I've had this mom gig going for over 17 years.

16 Have you ever been fired or laid off from a job?
Once. We don't talk about that.

17. What is your favorite drink?
Cocktail? I hardly drink anymore because of the headaches. I do appreciate a good martini or margarita. And a Colorado Bulldog makes me very happy. Until the migraine hits, anyway.
Mostly, I drink tea or water. All. day. long.

18. What is the most expensive bottle of wine that you have in your residence?
None. Unless you count the cooking sherry. I LOVE wine, but, again, it's rarely worth the migraine.

19. Have you been divorced?
Yep. We aren't going to talk about that either. You can read my archives or ask me about it if you're just dying to know.

20. How old were you when you stopped getting ID'd for Alcohol?
Years and years and years ago...

21. Favorite casino?
Ugh. Not a fan of casinos. If it's at the beach, then you go do your gambling thing & I'll be sitting under an umbrella, reading a book, & sipping a frozen beverage.

22. Are you happier now than you were in high school?
Hmmmm. I don't know. I am more comfortable in my own skin and have a better idea of who I am. I made some of my very best friends in high school, and I'm still in touch with many of them (even without the help of Facebook!). So I don't want it to sound like high school was a miserable experience for me. But 25 years does give you perspective, doesn't it?

23. Did you ever have Hypercolor shirts?
No, my mom wouldn't ever buy me one. How did those even work? I was always curious.

24. Do you remember when Michael Jackson was black and attracted to older people?
Yes! I thought he was wonderful. Then all of the sudden he was super creeper.

25. Do you remember when MTV actually played music videos?
Yes! I remember the day MTV debuted. It was so great -  The Buggles' "Video Killed the Radio Star". Duran Duran, Journey, Chicago. (I may have just embarrassed myself)

26. Have you had a will made?
Yes, but it was years and years ago. I really need to have a new one done.

27. What music was in your cd / cassette player when you were 16?
The Go-Gos, Journey, Madonna, Tears for Fears, Duran Duran....and, it was definitely a cassette player. I didn't have cds until after I got married. I'm REALLY old, y'all.

28. Favorite fancy / upscale restaurant?
My very favorite restaurant in Candyland just closed. I'm still in mourning.

29. How long has it been since you attended a kegger?
Oh, my. Not in this century, I can assure you.

30. How many major wars have you lived through?
Let's see, I was born while we were still in Viet Nam. Grenada (!), both Gulf Wars, I'm calling the Cold War a valid war, the War on Drugs(?)

31. Where were you when you found out about 9-11?
We were stationed in England. It was  4:30 in the afternoon there and my neighbor came to see if my father-in-law had made it home since he had flown out that morning. I had no idea why he'd be asking. It was terrifying. SD was stuck on base for what seemed like days. We couldn't go anywhere, which was fine because I was too scared to leave our little village. I wrote some about it in my tribute to one of the victims of at the World Trade Center.

The meme that was accidentally posted here the other day was one from several years ago that I had gone back and edited (I KNOW; it's a disease) and when I hit publish, it changed the date. So annoying.

*sigh* Church People

Candyland is frozen over and I've had lots and lots of time over the past few days (four days to be exact; I've not left the house in FOUR days. It's like heaven) to ponder and, um  dwell  on a certain interaction that occurred last Sunday that has left a very bad taste in my mouth.

I love my church. No, seriously. My church is wonderful, and to be more specific, my Sunday School class is just downright amazing. When I hear people talk about how churches are so hypocritical and judgmental and only want perfect people in their buildings, I know that these poor individuals have never been to my church. My Sunday school class has seen me through the end of my miserable marriage, my divorce, a surgery and hospital stay that was beyond terrifying, and countless other crap that comes up in the course of a normal life. They have stepped up to be godly examples to my kids; taking my boys hunting, fishing, to ball games, and to Boy Scout events since their dad (who does his best - not ex bashing here) lives so far away. I've had people from my church step up to fix my plumbing, take care of my yard, drive my kids when I couldn't. Nobody has ever presumed to judge me or make me feel bad about the job I'm doing as a mom. Nobody ever acts like they are better than you. Nobody pretends that because they are on this committee of that council that they are more holy than you are. They recognize that everyone has flaws and that just because they are good at one thing, they aren't good at everything. It takes the whole Body of Christ to really make things work for a church. We all tend to be checking for the plank in our own eyes and leave it to you to find the speck in yours.  Basically, my big, wonderful church is, mostly, full of people that wouldn't fit the most definitions of "church people."

But...(you knew that was coming, right?)

As if to make a liar out of me, I had an encounter last week with a person from my church that made me feel about four inches tall. Then it just started to piss me off. This is a person I've known for a very long time. I've never been particularly close with this person, but I do appreciate what he does for the church. He and his family are some of those people who are there "every time the church doors are open." They really do fill a number of needs that our church has. He works a lot with the youth. And having two children in the youth group, I REALLY appreciate those who give their time to care for the spiritual growth of these kids. HOWEVER...

(small segue for explanation)

If you know me at all or have read much of my blog, you know that I struggle mightily with chronic migraines. A few years ago, the flight surgeon also determined that I have some sort of auto-immune disease that we never did figure out. After several blood tests and other attempts, this flight surgeon got assigned elsewhere and the remaining docs didn't have the time or inclination to play "What the hell is wrong with Buffi" any longer. Suffice to say, I do take care of my kids and try my darndest to get them to all the extra-curricular activities they participate in so that they can grow up to be healthy, well-rounded people. Some days, though, I wake up with a particularly terrible headache that keeps me from driving because I can barely open my eyes. Or when I do open my eyes, everything looks a little, um, wavy or weird and I feel like I can't trust my senses to guide me. On school days, I do my best to power through and at least get the kids to school. The cost of that is that I generally end up back in bed for the rest of the day until I have to get the boys. Although now that SP can drive, I can have her pick them up sometimes or I have had friends who do that for me once or twice.

Add to that: For the past several years, SugarPlum  played on a club soccer team that required us to travel to Metropolis to our south in order to play. So many, many weekends, we missed church because of soccer games. Now that she is a junior in high school, her club team basically disbanded because juniors & seniors would rather spend weekends with their friends and/or working than travelling two hours each way to play soccer. Yes, I'm a soccer mom without a soccer team...but that's another post for another time. The upside of this is that we have been able to go to church much more often and the boys have finally been able to be way more involved in some of the activities at church. Yay! [now that I am thinking about it, these are the same parents who made it a point to tell me that they would never put sports before church...whatever]

Now, there are still some Sundays when I wake up, open my eyes, and the pain that comes shooting from every direction causes me to lie back down and say, "NOPE. Not happening today." So, I take some migraine medicine, drink as much water as my queasy belly will allow and go back to bed, hoping that the pain will pass. Am I proud that I'm missing church and causing my kids to miss? No. I'm very sad about this. Could I get SP to take them to church. Probably. But my brain isn't exactly functioning at capacity and the ridiculous amount of nagging it takes to get those boys ready to go anywhere, much less dressed in a manner acceptable (to me anyway) for church, is usually beyond my brain's paltry abilities at that point. So we all stay home.

Last week was one of those Sundays. However, by Sunday afternoon, I was feeling much better and was able to get Bear to church for Bible Drill followed by a party that the youth group was having. When I went up there to fetch him after the party was over, this man (the one I mentioned waaaaay back there, before you stopped reading, because golly this has turned into a long post!) pulls me aside and says, "I have a bone to pick with you!" I, knowing this man as a fun-loving guy with a good sense of humor, chuckled and said, "Okay, what did they do now?" 

THEN, this man - this self-righteous man - proceeds to SCOLD me, saying that Bear told him I had slept in this morning and that I have a responsibility to get my kids to church every Sunday. He didn't think it was okay for me to just sleep in when these boys wanted to be at church. I was speechless. I smiled, nodded and told him that from now on, I'd be sure to have Bear call him when his mom was too lazy to get the kids to church. Okay, maybe I left out the "when his mom was too lazy to get the kids to church" part, but I was just floored. 

I carry so much guilt over what I cannot do when I'm going through a bad streak of migraines. Not to mention the guilt I feel for my kids having to grow up with divorced parents. I was awfully proud that I'd been getting us to church as often as I had. I was also feeling pretty good that I'd gotten Bear to church that night. I truly felt like somebody punched me in the gut. Now I can hardly look at him or his wife (who has also chastised me in the past for Bug missing Sunday school, but not to that extent) without feeling angry. And I don't like that. 

I wish that people could understand that many of us are doing the best we can and that what we need most is encouragement when we are getting everyone to church. I wasn't feeling God's love at all last Sunday. What I was feeling wasn't coming from God at all. Why can't people see that these kinds of interactions are what KEEP people away from church? If I hadn't been a member of this church for nearly ten years, I don't know what effect it would have had on me. I don't know that I would want take my kids back to a place where it seemed the policy was to make parents feel bad. Thank goodness I have my Sunday School class and other good, loving friends in my church who encourage and support me and never once make me feel bad for missing when I can't help it. I feel sad for those people who haven't had time to meet the friends I have and whose early encounters are with stereotypical "church people." Our church is a great place filled with the most amazing people. If you are active in your church, please consider how your words sound to others. No one person is more "holy" than another. Nobody gets to pass judgment on anyone else but God. So stop casting those stones already.

I'll get over this. But I just pray that I'm the only one that caught this man's judgment and not a new person who is struggling with their faith and feelings. It would be sad for something like this to drive someone away entirely.

(and if you made it all the way through, thanks for listening to my rant!)

*ahem* Is this thing on???

Evidently, I'm moving toward blogging YEARLY now. I'm quite certain everyone has given up on me now, so I imagine I'm just blogging for my own entertainment. There's a great deal of freedom in that, I suppose. Though I've noticed, every once in a while, someone drops by to see if I'm still alive -- or just accidentally clicks on the wrong link in their google search for their own actual sugar mommy. At least that what it looks like in the analytics. (Sorry to disappoint you accidental visitor. I'm broke and not interested in desperate strangers from foreign countries; you can move along now.) I considered posting another Q&A meme, but that was getting out of hand, so I'll refrain for now.

I suppose what spurred my desire to post again was looking at the old blog here while I was at my mom's house, trying to find my cranberry sauce recipe that I'd forgotten to print. On the same page with the recipe  were posts that had pictures and sweet stories about my babies. My Bug was TWO years old & freaking adorable. Well, to be fair, they were all three adorable. And I'm really regretting not documenting the last few years better. But, it is what it is.

I hope that you, dear reader, had a wonderful Thanksgiving. My Thanksgiving this year was okay. Made pies. Made cranberry sauce. Left said cranberry sauce at home. Saw most of the family, except for my sweet cousin who had the audacity to go and get married. Not cool, man. I was able to spend time with my precious, perfect, amazing two-year-old genius nephew, (who on a whim, I've decided to call Sparky here on the blog, for no reason other than that's the first thing that popped into my head). He lights up my life and makes me feel so happy! There's nothing like hearing "Aunt Buffi! You're here!!" We headed home today, ostensibly so that I could write the four papers I have due Tuesday. You see how well that's going.

Speaking of writing papers...I graduate in May! (Nice segue, right?) Yes, I will have a Master's degree in counseling. Yay! And then, I will need to find a job. Piece of cake in this economy, right? Ummm...yeah. Anywhoo...I'm doing my practicum right now & will start my internship in January (which is exactly the same as the prac, only I need more hours). I'm loving what I'm doing now & hope I can find something similar after graduation.

Holy smokes this is the most boring post EVER. I apologize. Clearly, I'm out of practice. I'll try harder. But so far those promises have not panned out well. If it's your first time here, read my older posts. I was full of all kinds of funny. Though I'm still bitter that all of my comments have disappeared since Haloscan bit the dust. Regardless, I'm awfully proud of my little blog here. Maybe I can revive it now that I'm almost done with all of that sill school crap. *fingers crossed* My kids are still the absolute funniest people in the universe, so I really should keep documenting their stuff, though they get a little pissy about the embarrassing stuff, so you might have to ask nicely. :)

This again?

My new therapist seems to be of the opinion that I need to journal more. When he asked if I had ever journaled, I told him about my blog & that I don't write nearly as much as I used to. I suppose there are several reasons why I don't write here much any more. I'm sure Facebook plays a large role in this. I am now able to express those passing thoughts in short bursts on my FB page rather than forming an entire post around what's going on. This is probably good & bad. I'm thinking that maybe I should give myself time to process my thoughts a little more. The instant feedback of Facebook is very satisfying.

Also, my kids are getting older and don't necessarily appreciate having stories about them broadcast to the whole internet. To be fair, though, at this point probably fewer people would see stuff on the blog than do on FB at this point. It's not like I get 300-500 hits a day like I did a few years ago when I wrote regularly. I was featured in the Best of Blogs book one year, for crying out loud! (I think it was 2005.) I'm still sad that Haloscan disappeared & took my comments with it. There was so much in those comments - humor, relationships, encouragement - that is just gone now. I had posts with over 100 comments. This just looks like a sad, sad blog that nobody's ever read now.

It's not really that I don't have the time. I mean, I am in grad school right now, but I still spend a stupid amount of time on the internet that could be spent writing. I mean, if I'm going to be on the computer anyway, I could at least write. Or, you know, I could do laundry or de-clutter my house, or study, or exercise, or something productive, but who wants THAT? How silly.

Something needs to change though. I have this great place, I should take advantage of it. Whether anyone reads or not is beside the point. I need to do this for me. I'll try to bring the funny, but I think it may take a bit to get back in the groove. I am going to try to write at least a little something several days a week, just to get back in the swing of things. Of course, looking back, I've said all this before, more than once even, so time will tell, I suppose....

Feel free to hold me accountable!

Like 50 Shades of Gray, but without the sex, or all the people reading it....

I haven't written anything in a ridiculous amount of time and now I'm posting a meme?? I know, right? But I can't figure out how to get started again, so maybe this will get the ball rolling. Maybe not. Who knows. Anyway, here we go....

(Stolen from Lauren at Filing Jointly, Finally)

1. What is your best friend's Mom's name? Much like a fifth grade girl, I have many "best friends." The Queen's mom's name is Patricia (I think). Elizabeth's mom's name is Susan. As for CRB (my oldest friend - meaning, we have known each other since jr. high), we don't say her mom's name out loud for fear of conjuring the old biddy up. She's like Voldemort...in more ways than you would believe.

Imagine this, with lipstick

2. Where is the weirdest place you have a mole?  I'm ridiculously fair skinned & have blazillions of moles all over. My grandmother told me that's where the angels kissed me. I have a strange one right next to my nose that looks like a giant zit. I had one on my belly for a long time, but the dermatologist decided that it looked funny & cut it out one day at an appointment. No time to prepare, no time for a Xanax, just "That looks ominous, we should get it cut out & off to pathology." BOOM. It was fine. No cancer.

3. Who was the hottest teacher you ever had? Hmmm, there was a coach in junior high who looked just like Magnum, PI. Golly, he was hot. I can't remember his name though. Wonder if he still looks like Tom Selleck. Because Tom is totally on my list.

Only they made Coach Hottie wear a shirt at school. Bastards.

4. Have you ever made out in a movie theater? Why? What have you heard?

5. What body part do you wash first?  Face. If I don't wash it first, I forget & then I end up with facial scrub in my hair at the end of my shower. I'm a genius that way.

6. Do you hover over the toilet in public bathrooms? I really don't have the leg muscles anymore to "hover." If it is especially gross, I will do my best, but if I can, I'll just hold it. Oh, the joys of getting old.

7. What's the strangest talent you have? In spite of the fact that my leg muscles are weak, I am ridiculously flexible. I don't know if it has to do with all of those years of ballet or just that almost all of my joints hyper-extend, but I am like one of those bendy-dolls. I'm not as flexible as when I was younger. I used to be able to slide my foot all the way up the wall & bring my nose to my knee. 

Also, I can crack almost all of my joints. People in class love that.

8. Do you have an innie or an outtie? I have an innie, but I've had so many surgeries that it's not quite as "in" as it used to be. Also there are surgical scars all around it. SEXY!

9. What's your favorite flavored Pringles? You know, I haven't eaten Pringles in a long time. Not since I found out that they are mostly NOT potato. But the plain ones were always my favorite back when I was naive and skinny and could eat whatever I wanted.

10. Have you ever been tied up? Um, no. Not as far as you know.

11. What was the last thing you ever got grounded for? Well, since I'm old, I have no idea about the LAST thing I got grounded for. Probably smarting off to my mom. The last one I remember clearly was the week before I turned 16. My grandparents had bought me a car (nothing fancy...it was a 1977 Oldsmobile Delta 88. It was HUGE. BUT, this was the mid-80s, so it's not like it was that old). ANYWAY...it was summer and it was Texas and it was HOT, so I decided that instead of walking the three blocks to the swimming pool, I would drive there. You know, I'd get home long before my mom got home from work and no one would be the wiser. Of course, my mom came home from work EARLY and showed up at the pool pissed off and I was grounded for like, a month. Way to celebrate, right?

It was just like this only red.

12. Do you parallel park or drive around the block? Oh, I can't parallel park to save my life. I just drive around and around until I find a space I can pull into. That's why I leave for class early. SugarPlum is learning to drive right now (I KNOW, RIGHT?) and I told her she'd better get her Daddy to teach her to parallel park while she's up there with him. That man could parallel park a Mac truck. It's ridiculous.

13. Have you ever had two dates in one night? No, I'm not that cool. Or slutty.

14. How many times have you been cussed out?  In person or on the internet?

15. Which shoe do you put on first? Whichever one I find first.

17. Have you ever been to a gay bar?  I have been to a drag show. Does that count?

18. Girls   rule, boys drool. 

19. Is there one thing all of your love interests have had in common? Ummm, me?

20. Did you French kiss before you were 16? What kind of a slut do you think I am? Don't answer that.

21. Have you ever been cow-tipping or snipe-hunting?  No.  (to borrow from Lauren) "Cow-tipping is mean.  How would you like if if you were just sleeping in your own bed and then suddenly you woke up on the floor with a couple of drunk cows hovering over you, mooing in amusement.   You would feel fucking scared right?"

22. Who is the last person you usually think about before you fall asleep?  Usually one of my kids. Depends on whether anyone has wet the bed.

23. Have you ever had a poem or a song written about you? My sophomore year of high school, this boy named Charles wanted to ask me to homecoming, but he was nervous. So, like a day or two before, he finally handed me a note with this poem written on it asking me. I don't have it any more, but I remember that it started, "Roses are red, Grass is green, I am a coward and you are a queen..." I had SO MUCH fun at homecoming with him that year. We stayed good friends until we graduated. I sure wish I could find him. Anyone from Candyland HS know whatever happened to Charles Green?

24. If you had to choose to not ever wash your bed sheets again or not wash your bath towel ever again, which would you rather not wash? EW. How gross are you?

25. Have you ever found anything in your parents' bedroom that was questionable? My parents' bedroom still has the original 1970's green shag carpet. That's mighty questionable if you ask me. Also? Nasty.

26. What was your childhood nickname? My mom's side of the family (being from West Texas & Oklahoma) all have double names - Tommy Ray, Lena Faye, Katie Beth, Bessie Jean, you get the picture. My name is very long and has lots and lots of syllables. So most of my life, I was called Buffi Lou. Also, my daddy still calls me "Pete" and 2D Bug. I have no idea why.

27. When is the last time you played the air guitar? I might do that when I'm goofing around with the boys. I remember these guys in college whose house we would go hang out at on the weekends, we called it "The Homestead." As it would get later, when certain songs came on they would hold their hands & arms like they were playing guitar right against their chests. They called it playing "titty guitar."

28. Have you ever peeked in the opposite sexes locker room? Oh, my no. Have you SMELLED a men's locker room? I can barely stand to walk by.

29. What's the weirdest thing you have done while driving?  I have three kids. I cannot think of all the weird things I've done while driving. Administered spelling test? Changed clothes? I don't know. I may have to come back to this one.

30. Have you ever bitten your toenails? Mine? No. 

31. How do you eat your cookie? Out of the vicinity of the children, lest I have to share.

32. When working out at the gym, do you wear a belt? HAaahaa!! "When working out at the gym?!" That's the funniest assumption I've heard all day. 

33. Name something you do when you're alone that you wouldn't do in front of others. I don't know. I'm pretty shameless. 

36. How many drinks does it take before you get drunk? I really don't get drunk anymore because the hangovers last for DAYS. Although, if you ask my cousin, a bottle of mojitos will definitely kick my ass, no matter how thick that glass is. (totally inside joke that only one person is going to get, sorry)

37. Have you ever sniffed an animal's butt? ::sigh:: Not on purpose.

38. How often do you clean out your ears? Every time I see the Q-Tips. It's a weird compulsion.

39. Do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper? Really?

40. About how many times a day do you pick a wedgie?  Ew. Haven't counted. Don't plan to.

41. Do you have any strange phobias? I really hate crowds. I don't know that it's a phobia, but it's definitely an aversion. Also, I sometimes have to take a Xanax before I can go into WalMart. True story.

42. Have you ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? Mmmm...not that I can remember.

43. What is the stupidest thing you've ever done at a bar? Early in my marriage to SD, we were at the Officers' Club one night and I decided that I could out-drink a couple of the guys in his squadron. Two pitchers of beer later, it got ugly. We'll leave it at that.

4. Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted?  See above: two pitchers of beer.

45. Have you ever called your love interest by an ex's name? Nope. Never.

46. Have you caught a guy/girl farting while on a date? Well, yes. Because I date human beings, not robots. 

47. Have you ever played naked Twister? Oh, my. No.

48. Have you ever been drunk at work? I think probably in college there were a couple of mornings where I showed up to sell shoes still a little tipsy. I'm not proud to admit that.

49. Have you ever found your date's/lover's brother or sister more attractive? No

50. Do you want to bring sexy back? Didn't Justin Timberlake do that a few years ago? Yes. Yes, he did.

Fun with tags...

I know, it's been a long time. Oh well. This is cool though. I made this tag cloud on a site called Tagxedo.com VERY FUN to do! I may frame it. Hee hee!

The "C" Word ( among others)

So much - too much - has happened over the past year or so. Much that I cannot (or rather choose not) to make too terribly public. Although there are people in my life *ahem* who would beg to differ about that last point, but I won't go into that either. Suffice to say, I have no desire to make this into another navel-gazing post about why I haven't posted. Or maybe that's exactly what I'm about to do. Who can tell?

It's funny when you have a blog that was at one time very frequently updated because then as your life gets to a point where you aren't blogging for whatever reason, you feel that you must explain why it is you've been absent. Only, you really don't want to explain, so you put off writing for even longer and it turns into a vicious cycle and suddenly, you find that you are blogging seasonally at best.** So, I'll leave it at this: We are all good. I hope that you both all had a lovely Thanksgiving, a fabulously blessed & joyful Christmas and that the New Year brings all the happiness in the world.

That should hold me till at least March, right? (Also, SugarPlum turns 15 next week. FIFTEEN. Oh. Em. Gee. Who let that happen?)


Now, I shall share a little story that sums up my life quite nicely these days. It takes place in the van yesterday after we dropped SP off at a friend's house. The boys were doing their "annoy the crap out of Mommy" thing and coming very close to making my head explode. I said something about them needing to take it down a notch or there would be unpleasant consequences. In the spirit of throwing your brother under the bus, this exchange took place:


Bug: "Bear said the "c" word today."
Me: "You know tattling is not o....WAIT, he said wha?? What "c" word did you say?"
Bear: .....
Me: "WHAT DID YOU SAY?"
Bear: (hesitantly) "um, 'crap'...."
Me: (small sigh of relief) "Well. Hm. That's not nice for kids to say. So, uh, don't say that."
Bug: "What? 'Crap'?"

And this is why I only have two kids now....

**Also? You find yourself writing ridiculous run-on sentences that will probably make you cringe once you take the time to actually LOOK at what you've written. AND THEN, you begin to wonder why you are writing in second-person since that seems awfully affected but you can't seem to find a way to stop, so you just keep typing until you decide that perhaps you should just hit "PUBLISH" already and get your butt to bed. Or not.