Just stick band aids on 'em already stop & your whining...

Our getaway was just what we needed. We came back refreshed, revived, and closer than we have been in a long time. Our marriage seems to be getting back on track. Amazing what just 24 hours alone can do for you. I feel like I am falling in love with my husband all over again. How sappy that looks when I type it.

I had to pack quickly Wednesday before we left. We had an appointment to get to and I had slept in. Bug was finally feeling better but he is on this "Daddy Daddy Daddy" kick where I can do nothing for him. So, when it came time for his nap, Daddy had to put him down, because Mommy was no good! This has never happened to me. The other two have had their "Mommy only" times, but never "Daddy only." It's bizarre to me. (and I don't like it, but I'm not supposed to admit that so let's just keep it between you and me, okay?!)

Anyway, I packed so quickly that I didn't pack the right color bra. I wore a brown sweater and so, I had on a white bra. The other sweaters I had packed were off-white. And we all know that you can't wear a white bra with an off white sweater. Okay guys, you are just going to have to trust me on this one, it's just not done. A girl just ends up looking bad. This is so NOT the point of this post, it is just getting us to the point of this post.

So, I drag SD all over the mall looking for a bra that fit. The problem is that I stopped nursing Bug a month ago and am left with very little in the mammary area, ifyougetmydrift. We started at Victoria's Secret. They didn't have anything small enough. Okay, let me clarify. They didn't have anything comfortable and affordable that was small enough for me. I really didn't feel like paying $40 for an underwire bra that I don't like just because it's the right color. Besides, the dressing rooms were all full and I didn't feel like waiting.

Next, we went to Macy's and their lingerie dept had a whole bargain bin of bras for only $9.99. So, I tried on a 36A and a 38A and both were way too big. How embarrassing.

Next, we looked at Sears, a store in which I loathe to shop for myriad reasons I won't bore you with here, because, honestly, this post is boring and wandering enough as it is. Once we found the lingerie dept, SD located the bras for me (he's handy that way). I found those Playtex ones that have the "in between" sizes. I was looking for a 36 or 38 A in a nudish type of color. I ended up grabbing an "almost A" by mistake. Guess which one fit. Uh huh. Yep. Almost A. So, really, I don't need a bra so much a bra as a "bra-lette." Or an undershirt. Very demoralizing.

Then, today, I was at Meijers buying sweatshirts for my kids and looked over at the training bras for girls. Sure enough, there was a size 36. Just for research purposes, I grabbed it.

Yes, of course it fits.

The way I see it, I have two choices. I can be completely shattered about being flat chested and in need of a training bra at best. OR I can be overjoyed at my now "youthful" bustline, knowing that I will not have to worry about having boobs that sag to my knees (remember the scary nekkid lady from the gym?!) and the fact most of the winter I don't have to wear a bra at all. So, I am going with option B. Because I am a glass is half full kind of girl. Or, I guess in this case, I'm a cup is half full kind of girl.

Quick Christmas & Post-Holiday Recap

*New toys - eleventy skrillion

*Kids on antibiotics as of Christmas day- 2

*Kids on antibiotics today- 1 (and he is the one who was NOT on antibiotics at Christmas!)

*Nights I went to bed before midnight- you have GOT to be kidding

*Grandparents in town- 2

*New sleds from said grandparents- 2

*New sets of mini-skis from said grand parents- 1

*Inches of snow on the ground- ZERO

*Number of bored, irritable children who are all still recovering from illness and shouldn't play outside- 3

*Hours until SD and I leave town for a quick getaway - 2

So long suckers!!!

Germ Central

After I posted Bear's pitiful picture the other day, the Goober Queen challenged me to a sick kid smack-down. And, at the time, she was totally winning. Bear is feeling much better, by the way, andwas driving me absolutely bat-shit crazy because hewas b-o-r-e-d. Thanks for all of your nice thoughts and prayers.

But by Wednesday night...SugarPlum was coughing. Not just that little cough cough of someone who has a cold but that down-deep-in-your-chest-can't-quite-inhale-or-exhale-all-the-way cough. My thought? Oh great, bronchitis, I knew I shouldn't have let her play in the snow today. So, SD got up early & started calling the hospital appointment line Thursday morning. (I got to sleep in because one or the other of the boys was up and needed me in there. Honestly I can't remember who anymore, the nights have started to blend together.)

We got to the doctor that afternoon, late of course, and got in rather quickly, surprisingly enough. The pediatrician was someone I had never seen before, but that doesn't come as a shock to me. Continuity of care is unheard of in the military. I saw the same doctor my whole childhood. And when I took my kids to my parents, Dr. Craig would see them as well. It was so nice. I was heartbroken when he retired this fall. Ummm, off the subject???

Anyway! Dr. Ta (really that was his name!) comes in and talks to me, talks to SugarPlum, who keeps telling him, "Well, Mommy says..." like I'm some puppetmaster or something. I tell her to tell him what SHE thinks and feels, not what I think.

He listens to her breathe. No wheezing. That's good. The child does not cough once the whole tome the doctor was in there. All I could think is that this is exactly what happens every time I take my car in for a strange noise, it never make that weird noise for the mechanic. I was sure that the doc was going to tell me that she just has a nasty cold and that the cough is post-nasal drip. Which would be fine except that it just sounded so bad you know?!

Alas, he says to me, "Well, I'm not going to send her for chest films, I'm just going to go ahead and treat this with a five day course of antibiotic."

HUH?? This must have shown on my face, because he then says:

"I heard a little crackle, which tells me that this is am atypical pneumonia. Given that she had the URI for several days before and has had fever, I'm giving antibiotics no matter what, I see no reason to waste your time with a chest x-ray. If, after five days on antibiotics, she shows little improvement, I want her back her on Tuesday, and we will then do films and blood work and see what is going on. So, we got our Zithro*max and went home.

That night, she woke up at about midnight with an earache. I gave her some m*otrin, actifed, and humibid. Then I got her a warm washcloth to put over her ear and laid in her bed with her for a while. She laid there for a long time, moaning in pain. I felt awful for her. There was so little I could do. I tried some of those numbing drops that had been prescribed for Bear a few months ago, but they didn't work. Finally, I told her I was going to check the internet. I googled ear pain, but didn't find much. So, I got on my email and sent out a "Mommy Distress Signal" to several mommy friends (who I thought might be up) asking for any suggestions. Within minutes, I had several responses. It was the coolest thing ever. And it was hilarious to see how many of us have insomnia! Of course, irony of ironies, by the time I got upstairs with the warmed olive oil (thanks Kris!) SugarPlum's ear felt better and she was able to fall asleep.

Earlier afternoon, Bug wouldn't eat and was acting strange. I offered him a smoothie, usually his favorite, and he said it hurt when he drank it and he cried & cried. Back on the phone to make ANOTHER pediatric appointment for Friday. I'm so sick of that place. I took him in Friday afternoon, and after a loooooong wait in the tiny exam room, the nurse practitioner comes in and moves us to another room at the other end of the hall. Whatever. Another person who hasn't seen my child before. Great.

She listened to him breathe. She looked at his eyes. She attempted to look in his mouth, he opened it for a moment only, but long enough for her to see that he didn't have strep throat. Then.....then she tried to look in his ears. Big mistake. He did NOT want her to look in his ears. He screamed and cried and fought and thrashed to avoid letting her look in his ears. She didn't see any sign of infection. Maybe a little fluid, but no infection. She did think that he had the beginnings of pink-eye, so she was putting in a prescription for eye ointment for him. (I was looking forward to that, I wasn't even convinced he had pink eye, had just hadn't slept)

While she was entering the prescriptions, he kept going on & on about his ear, to the point that she started to wonder if maybe he DID have an ear infection. So, she went to get an honest-to-goodness doctor to look in his ear. Great. Bug kept saying "I just wanna go home. I wanna go home!" It was so sad!" I held him down and let the doctor look in Bug's ears. Of course the ears looked great. "Perfect" I believe was the word the doc used.

So, how is everyone feeling now?? SugarPlum is breathing better, but still coughing and her ear is still hurting some. So, she is going to the doctor tomorrow. Bug is a little better. He isn't running as much fever, but he is still out of sorts and still not eating much so he is going back to the doctor tomorrow as well. I don't know what will come of these trips to the pediatrician, but something is just not right here. Maybe it's just Ohio. My kids are just not sick like this.

I'll give you the whole Christmas recap complete with pictures tomorrow. Hopefully everyone will be feeling better soon!

On to tackle the next world crisis

Merry CHRISTmas

THE BIRTH OF JESUS
In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria). And everyone went to his own town to register.


So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her first born, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger ."

Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to the one another, "Let's go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about."

So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen , which were just as they had been told. (Luke 2: 1-20 NIV)

The Soldier's Christmas

Peaches had this posted at her site as well. We both have quite a soft spot for the men and women protecting us over in the desert and all over the world really. God bless you all and Merry Christmas.


The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.

Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.
The sparkling lights in the tree, I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.

My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem.
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know,
Then the sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.

My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.

A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old
Perhaps a soldier, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.

"What are you doing?" I asked without fear
"Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"

For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts,
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said "Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night"

"It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.
No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.

My Gramps died at 'Pearl on a day in December,"
Then he sighed, "That's a Christmas 'Gram will always remember."
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of 'Nam
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.

I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile.
Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red white and blue... an American flag.

"I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home,
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat,

I can carry the weight of killing another
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother
who stand at the front against any and all,
to ensure for all time that this flag will not fall."

"So go back inside," he said, "harbor no fright
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."
"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
"Give you money," I asked, "or prepare you a feast?

It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son."
Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget

To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone.
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled
is payment enough, and with that we will trust.
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us.

Merry Christmas!!

Such a Senseless Death

If there were a uniform theme to this post, that would constitute a title, which, logically, would belong HERE

Bear is feeling better, thanks for all of your well wishes. Bug and SugarPlum are showing signs of illness, I am hoping that SP can at least make it through school tomorrow so that she can go to her Christmas party. She has played out in the snow every day for the last week. So, at least if she gets sick, it was worth it.

My Christmas present came today. I am pulling that baby out of the box tomorrow and doing some baking! I have been wanting one for so long. There was a Mervyn's going out of business in Dallas and one of my best friends (the Bride-to-Be) saw it. It was marked down quite a bit, so SD told her to get it for me. I am so excited.

We got all but two gifts mailed off Monday. All but The Queen and the Bride-to Be. But we all have an understanding. Gifts between us get there when they get there. Sometimes, they are on time other times, not so much. It's all good. Actually, the Queen has my gift for the Bride-to-Be. If she hasn't mailed it yet, I may ask her to mail it straight to B2B. Eliminate the middleman. Don't you love this whole stream of consciousness thing I have going with you people? If it weren't for the blog, I'd be walking around talking to myself. This way only YOU know I'm crazy.

I swore I wasn't buying any more presents for the kids. Then I took a look at what I had bought and noticed the great disparity in the number of gifts that SugarPlum and the boys have. She has such exciting diverse interests right now, I have had a blast shopping for her.

And the boys? Oh, the boys. They have just been driving me NUTS with the dumping and dispersing of the toys and crap that I have had a hard time making myself buy them anything. I got them these firefighter backpack hose thingies from Discovery*Toys this summer. You can put water in them but nobody better tell them that okay?! They have had so much fun playing firefighter that I thought they would like them. Now, I'm thinking that I'd like to get them fireman costumes or at least fireman hats. Problem? There are NONE in the Miami Valley, dammit! Of course, had I started looking sooner than the week before Christmas, I might have had better luck.

I got my dad one of those travel alarm clocks that you can record voices on and put a picture in. I'm going to record the kids saying "Cockadoodle doo, Gray Gray!!" because that is how they wake him up whenever he is here and he loves it!

I still don't have much for SD. He may be lucky to get anything. Heh.

I don't know if I have mentioned that my parents are coming on Christmas Day. And staying for two weeks. Did you get that last part? Two weeks, people. They are staying until after SugarPlum's birthday. I'm not sure I can stand that much togetherness. I may have to escape.

Thankfully, I have received a bounty of invitations as of late. If I show up on your doorstep, mumbling incomprehensibly, hand me a glass of wine, sit me down, pat my head and tell me everything will be okay. Just don't make me go back there. Promise?

And as if that weren't enough....

My Bear, he is a sick cub. He has ear infections in BOTH ears and Pink Eye in both eyes. This is in addition to the nasty cold. Or, perhaps, I suppose, as a result of the nasty cold. He got some good antibiotics today. And brother & sister got some eyedrops...just in case.

Doesn't he just look pathetic? And really, this is the best he looked all day.

Honestly, what kind of a twisted mommy posts pictures of her sick kids? He just looks so sweet somehow. In a "don your facemask, shower in Purell" sort of way.

Picking up the Pieces

I need to thank you all for your lovely comments and emails. Your prayers and well wishes are appreciated and needed. I have some of the best friends in the world. Here in the blogosphere and in the "real world." I love y'all.

Everyone here is Candyland is okay. Really. The only injuries are bruised egos and hurt feelings. But we will be okay.

You know that line from Steel Magnolias, " That which does not kill us make us stronger." It is true. The bomb has gone off, but everyone is still standing. And we will all be stronger once the pieces are all back in place. I'm up for the challenge. And I will succeed.

KA-BOOM!!

Out of the blue & like I never, ever imagined could happen. We'll be okay though.

Sorry to be so cryptic. I'll post when I can.

Five MORE Random Things

Okay, Peaches! Sheesh. I just did this Monday. I will try to avoid sleep related subjects, no promises, though...

1. Went to the doctor yesterday, in spite of the weather. He doubled all of my meds. Hopefully this will help. Although right now, the increase in the Ela*vil is making me soooo tired. (That's not really sleep related, is it?)

2. I haven't been to the gym in over a month.

3. I cannot parallel park. I will park far, far away to avoid parallel parking. This may be the remedy for my gym issue.

4. Fleece. Right now, fleece is my all time favorite fabric. The synthetic stuff, not the sheep stuff, Queen.

5. I know what my Christmas present is.


Since I just tagged five people Monday, I will only tag Christine again, since she all but asked me to. I don't need anyone else mad at me. Heh.

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about BUFFI 1. You all rock. Thank you for your words of encouragement. It makes a huge amount of difference to know that people understand. 2. I had a long talk with a very good friend of mine who is t-h-i-s close to having his PhD in Pharmacy about what to talk to the doctor about tomorrow. He helped a lot because I didn't want to walk in there saying "All my friends are taking ____ so that's what I want." 3. The weather is total crap today. They finally called a two hour delay for the schools just before we got up (natch). Then at about 8:00 they cancelled it all together. The base hospital is still open as of right now, so I still have my appt. But I'm not holding my breath. (Then I'd have to go to the ER! hee hee!) 4. Guess how many gifts I have wrapped already. Nope. Nope. Thaaat's right. None. 5. Guess what I'm doing this weekend. 6. In addition to getting Sharpie off of piano keys, the Magic Eraser will also get Sharpie off of the white porcelain nativity scene. 7. I must remember to put that Sharpie away. 8. SugarPlum lost a tooth last night. It was the first tooth she has lost in several months. She was totally freaked out. I hope I remember to do the tooth fairy thing. Don't laugh. I don't have a good track record. 9. SugarPlum wants a loom for Christmas. 10. Bear wants jets. 11. Bug wants Angelina Ballerina. 12. Guess who might be a little disappointed Christmas morning. 13. SD takes his last final today. WOO HOO! Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. HeartSongs (Karin) 2. Agog & Aghast (Raehan) 3. Old Old Lady of the Hills 4. Better Safe Than Sorry 5. Family Circus (Erin) 6. Give Me Something to Sing About (Angel) 7. A Prairie View (Carolyn) 8. Intricate Art (Leanne) 9. Sleeping Mommy

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Since she brought it up...

I have been trying to avoid talking about my depression and all of its accompanying whining**. I try to keep things upbeat and humorous around here. A few days ago Christine emailed me to tell me that, among other things, she had stopped taking Lexapro cold turkey. I share this with you only because she posted about it today and how it is affecting her. She mentions not being able to filter stimuli as well and having a much lower threshold for frustration. I am hurting for her and admit that I was afraid of this happening if only because of how I have been feeling ON my "happy" pills.

Things have been a little touch and go around here lately. I have felt as if I am teetering on the edge. The edge of what? I really don't even want to know. I find myself so easily irritated with my husband and my children. I can go off at the drop of a hat (or a toy!). I was so angry with Bear one afternoon last week for dumping out several buckets of toys and refusing to pick them up that I shouted. No, shout isn't even vaguely accurate. I screamed at the poor child. I screamed and screamed such that his big sister came in and offered to clean up the mess. To which I sharply told her no, he would do it. Then, I went upstairs to get Bug up from his nap. Bug, who had heard me screeching downstairs, saw me walk in and promptly laid back down, put his blanket over his head and said, "No, Mommy! I go back to sleep!"

It was so put of control and out of line and over the top. I was absolutely ashamed of myself. I called Bear to come upstairs. He was understandably reluctant. I called nicely and said, "Please, sweet SugarBear?" and he came up.

I pulled him into my lap in the rocker in his room and apologized and told him that it was very, very wrong for Mommy to shout at him that way and to say mean things to him. I told him that I loved him more than anything in the world and that I understood if he felt angry with me. He said that he felt sad and scared. My heart was broken for my boy. For all my children and it was my own fault.

I wish I could say that this was an isolated incident. It doesn't happen every day or even every week, by any means. But that it happens at all is unacceptable. And really, it is bubbling under the surface so much of the time lately. I feel very stressed and I don't know why.

The other manifestation my depression takes is that I can't be motivated to DO anything. This is why I have about eleventy hundred loads of laundry that need to be folded (SD has washed at least half, if not more of those), and those that DO get folded sometimes take weeks to be out away. I feel like I am being pulled below the surface, drowning in something I can't identify. (so many metaphors, Buffi, pick one, would ya?)

When I started taking anti-depressants, it actually was to control my migraines, but the Lexipro sort of highlighted my depression more than helping it. The doctors concluded that it could most likely be contributed to PPD, which isn't surprising, given the insanity that surrounded my pregnancy & Bug's birth. Anyway, we finally hit on a drug that worked. At least for a while.

I talked to SD about it tonight. I have a doctor's appointment Thursday afternoon as a follow-up to the Topamax. I am going to increase my dosage of that, since I am still having the headaches - fewer, but, still. I am also going to discuss increasing or changing my antidepressant. The stress around here is not going to let up over the next six months. If anything, things are only going to get crazier. Trust me, you'll get some good reading here soon! Let's just say that the Air Force has all sort of surprises in store for me!

Thanks for listening, y'all. I have made some very good, supportive friends here in the last six months. I appreciate you more than you know. I'll try to keep the whining to a minimum. I promise.


**I want to clarify that I do not in any way think that Christine was whining in her post. Hers is so well written and articulate and without the self pity that you read here. I love you, Christine. Thanks for making me take a good hard look at myself!

Handy Household Hint #42

No, it's not your imagination, I do seem to be having a lot more of these lately, Tis the season!

Did you know that Mr. Clean Magic Erasers will get Sharpie off of piano keys?

Mostly.

Gotta run. Time out is almost over.

Handy Household Hint #41

Don't try to run the toaster oven, microwave and teakettle all at the same time. It's a good way to get a whole lot of nothin' cooked really fast.

Who turned out the lights?

Okay, Fine, I'll play

Anne and The Deputy's Wife both tagged me with this Five Random things meme, so I guess I'll do it. I don't need the cops after me. Are there blog police??

Okay, so Five Random Things About Me...

1. I sleep with a teddy bear every night. It's the one my daddy gave me for Christmas my senior year in high school to replace the tattered one I got when I was two. (It wasn't tattered when I was two.)

2. I also sleep with an eye pillow. I know. How affected.

3. My feet cannot seem to get warm. I am wearing boot socks, Theresa. Brrrr.

4. I can't seem to go to bed before 1:30 every night. I'm tired all day, but I can't complain, because it's my own damn fault. (See, honey, I own up to it!)

5. I am so boring. This is the most interesting stuff I could come up with about myself.


I'm also supposed to tag five people for this. I hate tagging people, but, since it's Christmas (whatever that has to do with it): Christine, Theresa, Cori, Angel, and Erin.

Ho Ho Ho.

Woo Hoo! Snow Day!

The SugarBabies enjoying the snow

We finally got enough snow Friday for them (whoever "they" are) to cancel school. All of the area schools had cancelled Thursday night. Except ours. Our district waited until Friday morning to cancel. Dorks. Of course, it didn't matter. Bug was up at six regardless. He is so rude.

Yes, the infamous snowflakes/Rorschach tests

They bugged me all morning to go play in it. I, being the senselessly health-conscious mommy that I am, wouldn't let them go outside until the temperature topped 20. Or when their Daddy got home whichever came first. I hate hanging out in the cold. But they had a blast. They got to sled down the hill in our front yard and build a fort.

Bear emerging from the snow fort

I took them out today. It was a balmy 28 degrees! I took some Christmas card pictures (yes, finally!), and a few other shots. If you want to see the whole set, look here.

Fashion Emergency!

Found my skirt today. YAY!! Finally, a black skirt (or two - SD, you didn't see that) that I can wear to church. Nothing fancy or special. Long enough to be warm. They'll look good with sweaters. I'm a simple girl. (Be quiet)

However, my quest did raise this question. Gauchos...why? Did we not learn our lesson the first time? Are these flattering on anybody? I think not.

This must be stopped. If not us, who? If not now, when?

Since there has been some confusion as to what gauchos are, I thought I would post a picture to clarify the matter. See? Nobody, not even models, look good in gauchos.

When good raddits go bad....

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about Buffi 1. It is freakin COLD in Ohio. Five inches of snow tomorrow. Bleh. 2. The next person who says something like, "Oh, this is nothing! Wait till February!" gets an icicle through the forehead. 3. Our driveway is on about a 60 degree incline. If it's icy, we have to park in the street and pray for mercy as we walk up to the door. 4. I love the heated seats in my van. 5. Cold weather=bulky sweaters & coats= no bra for days!!! 6. I love my winter hat. It is very cute AND? it keeps my ears warm. I got it at Marks & Spencer when we lived in England. I hope I never lose it. 7. One last good thing about cold weather? I can keep my Diet Coke in the garage and it's always cold. The beer and vodka are out there too. Oh, and the extra milk and OJ. 8. See, I can find a silver lining! 9. Can I have the sun back now? 10. Skirts. What happened to skirts? Now that my ass is carrying all of this Ohio fat, none of my church dresses fit. I want to just get a couple of skirts to wear to church. Not the flitty, flirty skirts of very little fabric that I keep finding. I just need a longish black or khaki skirt to wear with sweaters and boots. Is that too much to ask? 11. There is so much going on right now that I want so badly to blog about. But, I can't. Not yet at least. But I will. When I can. I promise. It's cool. Man. Very exciting. 12. I am purging all superfluous toys from my house this week. The toys that are only used as dumpage when the boys play "garbage man" such as puzzle pieces, random blocks and various Little People accessories are now GONE. The children have been given ample warning. There will be wailing and gnashing of teeth. But I. am. fed. up. It's gone. I'm simplifying our lives. 13. Hmmmm? What's that? All of those random kitchen tools I don't ever use? No, you may not touch them. At least not until I begin dumping them onto the floor. Then, it's open season. Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. Ivory Frog 2. Family Circus 3. Multiple Mania 4. Peace, Love & Sanity for All 5. Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Don't #%^* With Rudolph

Put it on genius!

It is but 22 degrees outside right now. Ten with the wind chill.

Why then, did I just look out the window and see my daughter walking home from school carrying her coat???

Tuesday Giggles

Next time try a shoe

with apologies to Holli

I have been having to stay on SugarPlum to clean up after herself in the bathroom post-toothbrushing. I often walk in to find water all over, toothpaste smeared in the sink, on the counter, on the ceiling(?!), used floss and cups (yes, multiple) strewn about and her toothbrush lying next to the toothbrush holder. *humph*

But really, I have never seen anything like I did a few nights ago when I walked into the bathroom to brush Bug's teeth. There was a pool of water on the counter as well as water dripping down the mirror and the wall. So, I called SugarPlum into the bathroom, asking what in the world this gigantic mess was.

She came in, innocently batting her freakishly long eyelashes (really, she's like a mascara commercial), "What mess, Mommy?"

Me: "All of this water"

SP: "Oh. Well....there was a spider and I was trying to kill it."

Me: "Okay, but that doesn't explain all of this water."

SP: "Hmmmm. Well, maybe I forgot to dry my hands first."

Me: "No, I don't think that accounts for this much water."

SP: "Well, I tried to kill the spider with water."

Me: "With water?" ::eyes narrow, looking with suspicion:: What do you mean?"

SP (eyes now downcast): "I was spitting water on it, but it just kept running."

Me (exasperasted): "So, how'd that work out for you? Did you kill it?"

SP: "No, it ran behind the mirror."


Superior Cognitive Ability. Indeed.

Always read the fine print!

Be very, very careful when you are buying things on EBay or other online auctions this Christmas Season. Always read the ENTIRE posting. You could end up with this. What a clever fellow.

Let it Snow!

A long time ago, I was a kindergarten teacher. Children adore their kindergarten teachers. They hang on the teacher's every word. They are enthusiastic about the lessons that are taught and the crafts that they get to do. They are eager to please. Kindergartners put toys and learning supplies back where they belong, put books in the bookcase and throw trash in the...wait for it...trash can!

Then I became a mommy. Welcome to reality, baby. My children have no interest in cleaning up toys or replacing books in the bookcase. Trash isn't so much trash as 1) possibly something for a future art project (yeah, right) or 2) something to kick around until it is shredded into about eighteen tiny pieces of trash.

Today, Bear didn't have school. Why? Because it is December 2, of course. It's a holiday, right? No, I couldn't figure it out either, but, no school. I told him yesterday, as we watched the snow, that we would make paper snowflakes. He kept getting confused and asked when we were going to make paper out of snow. How disappointing that I could not defy the laws of physics and chemistry and do just that.

So the time came this morning that I decided to round up the boys and make snowflakes. This was shortly after they began beating one another with kitchen implements in their pretend bakery. Nobody likes an aggressive baker. So, I fetched the paper, cut it into squares, sat the boys down and showed them how to fold the paper. They watched obediently and began to wad the paper into little balls. That voice in the back of my head said to me, "Um, Buff, these are not kindergartners. These are your boys, and they are two and a half & four and a half years old." Oh, yeah! I gave Bear my folded sheet and told him to hold it. Folded another sheet for myself, gave Bear the little kid safety scissors, picked up my scissors and began to show Bear how to cut the paper. I opened up the snowflake and we all oohed and aaahhed and proceeded to make a whole mountain of intricate snowflakes for the rest of the peaceful afternoon then chaos ensued. Bug wanted to cut.

I may be blonde, but I am not stupid. One thing I did retain from college and that Early Childhood degree is that you don't give scissors to a two year old. I think they teach that on the first day. So, Bug was pissed. I was trying to involve him by letting him show me where to cut. He wasn't going for it. When I unfolded the one he "helped" with and handed it to him, he grabbed it, ripped it up, and reached for Bear's snowflake. I looked at the clock and decided it was nearly naptime and perhaps this activity was more appropriate for just Bear and Mommy.

Once Bug was asleep and Bear had a chance to "rest" for a few minutes, we proceeded with the snow storm. I got more paper. I got some of the "silly scissors." We cut angles. We cut curves. We cut big pieces and small pieces and tiny pieces. Bear had fun cutting, although some of his snowflakes looked more like Rorschach tests.

I thought we might hang our creations on the front picture window, to lend a bit of holiday cheer to our as yet undecorated home. I gathered my snowflakes and took them into the front room, telling Bear to do the same. I kicked the dogs off the couch, again, and pulled the drapes back. I called for Bear and then went to see just what it was he was doing. He said he was getting "alla my snowflakes, Mommy!" And by "alla," he meant every scrap of paper that had been cut this afternoon.

Each tiny little shred was a snowflake. If I suggested that surely we could throw this one away since it (to the untrained eye, of course) was just an end piece, he would inform me that this one was in fact, his very favorite of all the snowflakes and as such should be given a place of honor among the snowflake display in the Candyland window. *sigh* Finally I put my foot down, (gently) and said that we could not possibly hang all of the "tiny" snowflakes, as they would impede our view of the street and how would we ever indulge our twice daily habit of watching SugarPlum walk to and from school if the front window was completely covered in tiny (though precious, I must now concede) snowflakes? "But I wanted Gray Gray and Gram to see all of them when they come for Christmas**" BINGO!! What a great idea. We are now sending the "tiny snowflakes" special delivery to Gray Gray and Gram from SugarBear to decorate THEIR house for the holiday season.

As far as he knows anyway.


**This must be read with the most pitiful sadness, meant to break a Mommy's heart.

Friday Funny

Handy Household Hint

If, while cleaning the remaining Thanksgiving leftovers out of the fridge, you notice that the dishwasher is getting awfully full, so you decide to leave some of said leftovers in their Tupperware containers on the counter for a couple of daysfew hours rather than deal with them at this moment, be sure to vent the lid on the cranberry sauce just a little bit. Failure to do so will lead to the fermentation of the sugars in the fruit which will lead to the lid POPping off and flying across the kitchen to the great delight of Bear and Bug any little boys in the vicinity.

Um, I read that in a magazine somewhere. Something like that would never ever happen here in Candyland. Excuse me now. I have to go buy more paper towels.


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