This afternoon though, on two separate occasions, I achieved the goal most mommies only dream of.
I had all three kids screaming, crying, and throwing fits at the same time!! And? Over three different things!!
Then? While Bug was in a time out for hitting, I told him he had better sit the hell back down or he would get a spanking. Because that makes sense. Right? To get a spanking for hitting?
I'm so proud. I now must pick out an evening gown to wear to the awards ceremony.
Cori's comment made me realize that I need to clarify that yes, I do indeed deserve the award. I made all three kids cry within a space of ohhh, say 45 seconds.
First, I made SugarPlum redo the math homework that her teacher sent back & said to redo. Totally unreasonable, I understand.
Next, I wouldn't let Bear keep the rope all to himself. He had to share. This is just much too involved to explain, honestly.
Finally, I would not let Bug type "W" endlessly on my laptop while I was trying to do the fabled Brownie corn maze post. (Still working on that, really)
Later, both boys were crying because they got time outs for trying to beat the living crap out of each other (thus, the quote that might just bring SuperNanny to my house). And, SugarPlum was pissed about something, I can't even remember what. Probably just because her mom is such a total dork. What will I do when she is a teenager?
So, you see, I AM the greatest. Bow down and worship at my awesome Mommyness. Now, or I'll put you in a time out, as well.
As for the gown, I'm torn between Vera Wang and Kathie Lee. What do you think?
**Bonus teaser quote from the Brownie trip: "What color's my butt?"