Playing Catch-up...

I have been a lousy blogger lately. I have had quite a bit going on, just not the energy to actually blog about any of it. So, here is a bullet list of what has been going on. It seems to be all I can muster.

*I finally had my thyroid scan last Tuesday and Wednesday. The node on my thyroid was a "cold node" (that makes me sound like I have a stuffy nose...that is chilly) which means that the doc could, in good conscience, tell me that it was not malignant.

*That whole process was pretty interesting and really deserves a blog post unto itself, but, for now, I'm still all "meh."

*The end result of all of the tests for ME means that I am now able to take my thyroid medicine again. I just wish it would start working immediately rather than taking weeks to really take effect.

*This weekend, I went with a group of AF wives to the Longaberger homestead and to some villages around there. I got to make a basket.

*By the time I made it home, I had quadrupled my Longaberger basket collection, as I only owned one before Saturday. I think that the baskets are lovely, don't get me wrong, but I cannot pay that much for a basket.

*That said, I did pay to make a basket which was cool. I also WON a basket for singing "Swingin' on a Star," plus we got a really nice bread basket that was included in the cost of the trip.

*I am sick, sick, sick of all of this rain. My boys need to play outside. But when they finally get to, I know that they will be covered in mud. Somehow, I don't think I will care.

*Heh, the irony of me bitching about the rain is that I am moving back to the land of the drought. In a few months, you will read here about how badly we need rain. The grass is always greener...well, except where there is a drought.

*My mom flies in tomorrow. She will be staying with us until we leave (in 29 days!) for TEXAS! She is driving back with me.

*Because she loves her grandkids and wants them to make it back to TEXAS! alive.

*Pray for us all, because our last week in dreary old Ohio, we will be staying in a hotel. All of us. In one suite.

*My mom and SD need at least 2500 sq feet to keep the fireworks at bay. This should be fun.

*Bug's birthday is Sunday. He will be three.

*We aren't having his party until later in the week, because SugarPlum and Bear both have at least two parties apiece that they are invited to.

*Bug won't know the difference, right?

*I have been having terrible insomnia lately, staying up until 2:30 several nights. Then I am sooooo exhausted during the day.

*I have been needing a nap every day, which just exacerbates this vicious cycle.

*I'm hoping the thyroid medicine will help this.

*I'm toying with changing my template. Zoot has a really neat one that I like, but I can't decide if I really want to change it. I think I'm just bored and restless. And fiddling with the template keeps me from folding laundry and cleaning toilets.

*Don't be surprised if there is a new template here later this week.

*Also, look for me on the news. I will be the lady whose family was killed my the mildew monster that grew out of the family's upstairs toilet.

*Someone be sure to tell the news crews to get a shot of my pretty new template in the story.

Happy Mother's Day!

Go over to MommyBloggers to find some fantastic answers to "Mommy" questions by some fantastic Moms!

Seriously, I would have won

This afternoon, the kids and I went over to the home of the lovely and oh, so talented Sheryl, of Paper Napkin fame. Our kids got along like they have known each other all their lives. Her little guy, Will, kept asking SugarPlum to tie his shoes. He is such a cutie. My boys walked in and saw Will's Home Depot "tools" and immediately felt right at home. So much so that Bear took off is jacket and promptly left it on the floor.

Yes, Sheryl is just as cool and funny as you thought she would be. And she has the cutest, sweetest cocker spaniel EVER. What a lovable dog! Oh, and her kids are nice too. HA! Seriously, her kids are the best. And Emily sent SugarPlum the sweetest email this evening. My kids asked if we could go back sometime. I, of course, said NO! Because I like messing with them like that. Hopefully, we will have the chance to get together with Sheryl and her kiddos a few more times before we leave. (BTW, only 33 days until we leave for TEXAS!!) And hopefully the weather will improve. It was rainy and gross today. I think that the high was about 50.

Tonight, SD and I joined some friends for dinner. Several of us from his "class" have gotten together once a month or so for dinner at local restaurants. When you are only someplace for one year, you want to try to experience as much of it as you can. We always have a wonderful time and have had the opportunity to try some really wonderful places that we might have otherwise missed out on.

So...tonight we ate at a restaurant called El Meson, an "authentic" Mexican restaurant. It was really quite good. I had a kick-ass mojito and some really good flan (mmmmmm, flan!). My entree was nice, a grilled salmon fillet in a stack with a potato salad, fried plantains, black beans, and tomatoes. There might have been some other stuff, I'm not sure. It seemed sort of like an entree from Top Chef (Do you watch Top Chef?? It is fantastic!).

After supper we stopped at Marshalls so that I could look for a dress to wear to CRB's wedding in a couple of weeks. I love Marshalls and I can't believe I got to go after dinner. What a fantastic ending to a dinner out! (Incidentally, last Friday on our date night, SD & I went shopping as well. We went to a sporting goods place, to Sears looking at appliances AND to a furniture place to look at couches. We're crazy like that.) I actually did find a dress (yellow with butterflies...you have to see it to understand, because that sounds horrible typed out like that) and we found birthday presents for the boys (Battat trucks - a garbage truck and a crane - less than $20 for the two of them!). Then the babysitter called and said that Bug was running a fever, so we skedaddled home.

So, you would think that that would be the end of the festivities. That's where you would be wrong.

After the babysitter left, we decided to play a round of everyone's favorite game: What Stinks? (No, not THAT version of the game. I assure you that I would have totally won that version. Two words: black beans.) Every time we have opened the refrigerator the past few days, one of us has asked the infamous question, "Damn! What stinks in there?" Earlier this week, I cleaned out all of the leftovers that were more than a couple of days old and SD cleaned out the vegetable crisper of all old veggies. And let me tell you there were some science experiments in that drawer. BLECH. But it still smelled nasty. NAS. TEE.

By tonight, the olfactory experience was more than either of us could put up with any longer. So, we systematically cleaned out the meat/cheese drawer and then cleaned each shelf in the refrigerator and door. When we put it all back, it smelled better. But we have no idea why. The phantom stink. On the plus side, now my fridge is sparkling clean! Or as close to sparkling clean as it's gonna get. Let's be honest about who we are talking about here.

Don't you wish you were me?

Even more phrases I rarely use in conversation with adults

Oh, yes, it is time for another installment. Previous Phrases here and here.


*Please only pee IN the toilet.

*No, you cannot wear the same clothes to school that you wore to the campout.

*NO, that is dog poop, not a toy. Put it down. Now go wash your hands. With bleach.

*No rolling in the mud.

*Why are you muddy? Which part of "No rolling in the mud" did you not understand?

*No, you can't wear your Elmo sandals to church.

*You can have waffles, cereal, eggs or oatmeal for breakfast. Chips and salsa is not a breakfast option.

*(holding tissue up to child's face) Here, blow your nose. Blow. your. nose.

*Please don't pour sand on your head.

*Or your brother's head.

*Don't draw on your sister's homework.

*You MUST put your homework and colored pencils away if you don't want your brothers to draw on it.

*Spit stays in your mouth.

*There are no winners here. Just buckle your dang seatbelts so we can go.

*I said that "seatbelts" is not a contest. Now zip it or I'll pull over and you can WALK to school.

TV Pondering...

I'm watching Boston Legal right now and wondering....

is it just me or does Parker Posey look remarkably like the late 80's Ally Sheedy? Think St Elmo's Fire. It's a little fweaky really.

Oh, and isn't Freddie Prinze, Jr just adorable?!

Tying up loose ends...

Thank you all so, so much for your words of encouragement and support the other night when I was feeling like a bad, bad mommy. It's good to know that I'm not the only one who has days (or weeks...or months) like this.

SugarPlum is fine. So fine, in fact, that when I saw her Friday afternoon (SD let me sleep in, so I didn't wake up till she and Bear were already at school. Yes, I know, he's a good man!), I asked her if she was feeling better and she looked at me like I was crazy. Finally, she remembered her chest and said that she was better. She even apologized for making me worry - which was totally unnecessary.

She went to her Girl Scout camporee this weekend and, I think, had a really good time. She is pretty tired, though, and cranky, so I may wait until tomorrow to hear all about it. However...she did answer the question on everybody's mind this weekend...

Just what IS the "Dahk movie"??!

I asked her if she knew what Bug was referring to when he said The Dark Movie, and she replied, "Aladdin, maybe?" Bug confirmed this guess with a hearty "YES!" and proceeded to describe the movie with "the guy in the dahk and the fi-oh (fire) and the funny monkey." I'm so relieved.

So there, now you can sleep tonight. (because I know your world revolves around me, right?)

It's movie night...and I need help *updated*

Every weekend we have "Pizza and Movie Night," where the kids get to pick a movie and eat pizza on the floor downstairs while they watch it. Tonight is Bug's turn to pick.

Me: What movie do you want tonight, Bug?

Bug: Ummm, the "Dahk" movie.

Me: The dog movie??

Bug: No, the "Dahk" movie.

Me: The Dark movie?

Bug: YES! The "Dahk" movie!

Me: What's the Dark movie?

Bug: Ummm, it's the "Dahk" movie!

Me: Who's in the Dark movie??

Bug: The guy. The guy in the dark.


So, can you help me out here. I have no idea what we are watching tonight, and the pizza is ready. I'll keep you abreast of any clarifications....

**UPDATE**
Well, we watched The Jungle Book. No, that's not the "Dahk" movie, and I still haven't figured it out, but all were happy. I asked if maybe the "Dahk" movie was "Finding Nemo" but, sadly, it is not. The mystery continues....

Sometimes, I am able to see the "big picture..."

Mommy, my chest feels weird. Kinda like my heart can't beat or it's beating harder or something.

(giving her a hug) Oh, you probably overdid it today. That happens to me sometimes. Go ahead and get back in bed. After the boys are settled, I'll come in and snuggle you.

::get boys all finished with "one more potty trip" and in bed for good::

How are you feeling now, Sugar?

Well, my chest feels heavy still and my arm hurts right here, too. It's weird.

(trying to mask worried face) So, your chest feels heavy and your left arm hurts...

Yeah, it feels kind of like someone is pressing on me from the front and back. And my arm hurts, but just right here in this spot (pointing to the back side of her upper arm). ..

(strained smile, desperately attempting to hide the panic rising in my throat) Okay, well, lay down and let me go look some stuff up in my books and I will be back up in a minute.

::go downstairs and search bookcase for Taking Care of Your Child book. Look up heart problems...nothing, look up chest pain, read that it is most likely anxiety, confirming what I suspected most, and quelling, at least a little, my greatest fear::

Sweetie, how are you? Feeling any better?

I don't know. I just feel weird. ..

I think that you have just been feeling a lot of stress lately. We have a lot going on right now and so much coming up. All of this change can be hard to deal with, huh?

Yeah, that's true. And N (her ultra-moody friend next door) hasn't been very nice lately.

All of that really adds up. Maybe you just need to get a good night's sleep. And if you still feel like this tomorrow, we'll go to the doctor if you want.

Okay. But now I won't be able to sleep because my mind won't stop thinking.

Well, how about if I find you a nice, relaxing CD to listen to, would that help?

Yeah, it might. Thank you, Mommy. I love you.

I love you, too, Angel Girl. More than anything in the whole wide world.


So this is how my evening went. I have been so tired all week. And while I have tried to keep my grouchies in check, sometimes they have really come through. But tonight, everything was put in perspective for me, if only for a moment.

Logically, I knew that SugarPlum wasn't having a heart attack. But, geez, all those health classes over the years have ingrained in me that that "heavy chest, pain in the left arm" meant heart attack. Fortunately, SD remained calm throughout my desperate search through the book. He assured me that if I thought I needed to take her to the ER, he'd be here with the boys. Eventually, I settled down and went up to comfort her.

Then I went and laid down in my bed and read a magazine for a few minutes. But I couldn't keep my eyes open, so I turned off the light at about 9:45 and went to sleep. For an hour.

I woke up from the most horrible dream. I had gone to wake SugarPlum up in the morning and she had died. I lay there in bed, telling myself, "She's fine, go back to sleep," but of course it was no use. I would start to doze off and think of what I would do if she wasn't with me anymore. I thought about how it felt to hold her as a baby. Her little smile when I would say to her in my sing-song voice, "Mommy loves SugarPlum." Because, I can assure you, that smile could light up a room. Then I chided myself for criticizing her smile today, telling her not to curl her top lip up under like that. Am I ruining her?

I feel like all I do anymore is complain about her, not taking the time to appreciate the loving, giving, wonderful young lady she is becoming. Why can't I praise her for all of the hard work she does and for how she is always the one who sticks up for the underdog, sits next to the girl who always sits alone, is the first person to offer a smile (a beautiful, radiant one) and a hug to the friend who is having a bad day? Why must I nit-pick until she has to leave the room, almost in tears? Why don't I tell her more how proud she makes me every single day of her life? How I admire her willingness to take risks, to try to shoot that basket, kick that goal, try out for the musical, the spelling bee. She is the smartest, most courageous person I have ever known. I need to tell her that more.

And what would my life be without her? For so many years it was her and me against the world. SD would be deployed to the Middle East or working long hours in a fighter squadron and SugarPlum and I made our way through it together. Lots of times she was my reason for getting out of bed. I look back and I treasure those four and a half years that we had - just us girls. After Bear was born, she was such a huge help and demanded so little for herself.

Her smile and her usually optimistic attitude have gotten me through some really tough times. I frequently call her my "Sunshine" or my "Silver Lining Girl." When I have questioned an assignment (unhappily), she will remind me that "God always sends us where He knows we need to be!" How can one so young be so wise? If anything happened to my SugarPlum, I'm just not sure how I would be able to go on.

And so, I climbed out of bed and walked across the hall to her room. I laid down next to her and, wrapping my arms around her, marveled at how long and lean and strong she has become. I remember laying in bed with her nine years ago, her tiny, blanket sleeper clad body lying atop me. I hold her tight and just feel her heartbeat, steady and strong, her breath slow and deep. I breathe in her scent, now so different yet still uniquely her. And I thank God once again for the miracle that is my little girl. And I pray that she will always be around to make me crazy, to make me angry and to make me appreciate what she is.

I love you my Angel Girl, I whisper. More than anything else in the whole wide world.

Happy Birthday Peaches!!!!!

Head over to the Peach Pit and wish my wonderful, beautiful, FUNNY friend Peaches a Happy Birthday. And then chide her because, who goes to the gym on their birthday??!!

Happy Birthday, girlfriend! Eat a piece of cake for me!

Guess what I just found in the pantry

Why are they called "Thin Mints?" It's deceptive, I think.

More accurate perhaps, "Great-Big-Ass-That-Will-Never-Ever-Fit-Into-That-Swimsuit...Mints."

stupid Girl Scouts

How to piss me off *UPDATED*

Good: Sulk around the house, sighing over how bored you are every time your friend next door can't or won't come play with you. Bonus points for the big snit you have when I present you with the long list of ways I can relieve your boredom.

Better: Leave your Girl Scout project out in your room, next to the glue bottle AND leave your door open. THEN act all surprised when one of your little brothers goes in there and pours said glue all over the little wormy/butterfly things you were making for the camporee swaps.

As an added bonus, get pissy and yell at me when I tell you that you will have to pay for half of the cost to replace the craft materials. You know that your brothers like to go into your room and you have been repeatedly "encouraged" to shut and lock your door if you don't want them in there.

Best: Come downstairs at 9:30 at night, a full hour after I tucked you in and said very clearly, "Stay in bed and go to sleep. I don't want to see you unless you are on fire or bleeding from your eyeballs." Then tell me that you need to find your math journal.

Proceed to look for your math journal for a few minutes and proceed to lose your shit when you can't find it.

Become frantic and insist that the boys must have taken it from your backpack the day prior.

When faced with fairly concrete evidence to the contrary, get truly hysterical and tell me that your teacher is going to be mad because...

(wait for it)

...because you haven't had your math journal in class for the past several days. So, really, all that about your brothers taking it out of your back pack was a load of crap.

Then, ask me to write a note to your teacher (saying what, that you can't find your math journal? She already knows that) and get mad when I say that the math journal was your responsibility and now you must face the consequences of not keeping up with it. Including buying a new one if necessary.

Honestly, the whole crying yourself to sleep thing did make me feel a little bit bad for you, but not overwhelmingly. I have been saving your butt a little too often lately and it's time to grow up a little. Life sucks sometimes. Figure that out and come to terms with it now, little girl. Might not make it any easier, but at least it won't be such a big surprise.

***The missing math journal? The one that either A)up and walked off by itself; or B)SugarPlum's brothers absconded with and destroyed, leaving behind absolutely no evidence whatsoever?? Remember that (if not, see above)? IT HAS BEEN FOUND! Miracle of miracles. It was beneath a box upon the dining room table. The table which our girl insists she thoroughly searched, leaving no stone (or box) unturned. How did it get there? Magic? The Borrowers? Evil Mommy bent on destroying her life by the end of the third grade? It's a real conundrum.

Well...now the glue for her Brownie project is missing. So, never fear, there is enough anger and accusation to go around. Line forms to the left.****

I can see clearly now.....

Is it just me, or is this a bad idea??

Some things you just don't scrimp on.



***yes, I know it's a hoax, here is the Snopes link***

You know you are living in 2006 when...

(an email goody from a friend of mine)

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to copy and email this.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.

AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.

What's up???

Happy Wednesday!

So, how is everyone today?? Do you realize that next week is May? Holy crap, how did that happen? I've been tooling along, minding my own business (shut up) and all of the sudden my twelve months in Ohio is nearly over. Unreal. It's always amazing to me how the days seem to creep by, never seeming to end, but the months fly past so quickly that I don't even get used to being in one month before we are already into the next one. I almost wrote "March" on my offering check at church Sunday and here we are, it's the end of April.

One good thing about all of this is that it is just two more weeks until I can start taking my thyroid medicine again. At least I assume I can, I suppose I ought to call my doctor nurse practitioner Primary Care Provider (whatever the hell she is) and find out if I am supposed to start taking it again. Heaven help her if she says that I'm not.

The passing of these weeks and months means that I have already gotten one best friend married off and next month, I will be there to see my oldest friend (meaning I have known her since Jr High...I don't ant to try to do that math, too depressing) married to the man of her dreams. Chaquita Rosita Banana (hereafter known as CRB...the long version is a nickname from our college days) has had a rough decade or so. She has finally found a man who will adore her and treat her like she deserves to be treated. It is such a blessing to see the two women I love and admire most finally settled and happily married.

Back on the homefront, I still haven't gone through much stuff yet. I pulled a bunch of clothes out of SugarPlum's closet and drawers and need to sort through what I am going to take to Once Upon a Child and what I am just going to give to Goodwill. SP doesn't handle this well. Even though they are clothes that either don't fit or she won't wear (too hot, too scratchy, too loose, too wonky, you never know...) she doesn't want me to take them away. If she had her way, I think that her closet and drawers would be filled with everything she has ever worn since birth. I also found out that the kids' school in TEXAS! has a uniform policy. I used to be a huge advocate of uniforms, but now that SugarPlum has finally started to develop her own "style," I'm a little sad that she won't get to hone it for the next few years at school. I know that ultimately, I will appreciate it, because it will make getting dressed so much easier. Bear shouldn't be bothered since he wears polos most of the time anyway.

Bug will be going to our church's preschool, no uniform issues there. I say he will be going there, but if her won't finally decide to use the potty, I'm not so sure. I have a feeling that I know what a big part of my summer will be spent trying to achieve. My boys are just so hard headed.

Today, I get to go have lunch with my friend Suzy (hi Sooz!). At California Pizza Kitchen, YUM! Then we will go look at new glasses for her. Wheeeee!

OH! ohoh!! I forgot to tell you THIS....I just found out this weekend that one of my favorite, favorite bloggers, Sheryl of Paper Napkin fame, lives just down the road from me!!! (I know you're jealous) And our kids go to the same school! And now I can't wait to meet her. I just wish we had figured it out in June since I am moving to TEXAS! in six weeks (had I mentioned that? About moving?? I'm not sure if you were aware of the big move back to TEXAS!). Oh, well. Sheryl, you can come down and visit when the weather craps out up here about November or so.

in which she teeters on the edge of the abyss....

**I had this post ready to go up this morning, but evidently someone at Blogger was asleep at the wheel and I only got the "spinning explanation point of death." I know I was not alone, you should have seen the message boards!

Well, the descent is well underway. I had been reluctant to say how well I had been doing since the cessation of my thyroid medicine. I didn't want to jinx it. For a couple of weeks, I was doing okay, though. I had visions of myself crawling into the bed in my dark room and not coming out until the scan next month. But I was doing surprisingly well. I was in a pretty good mood. I was keeping the house, well, if not clean, then at least it wasn't a pit of garbage, rotting food and dirty laundry. The morning that we left for the wedding, I had put the last load of laundry in the dryer. Yes, for one brief and shining moment, all of our clothes were clean!!!

Maybe it was the wedding that kept me going as long as I did. But now that we are back, the laundry is piling up, there are dishes stacked in the kitchen from dinner last night, and I am sinking into the couch. My skin is dry, my hair is falling out, my nails are brittle and my heels are cracked. (Can you spell T-M-I???) Oh, and I have gained about twenty pounds in the past five weeks. I now weigh what I did when I went into labor with Bug. Delightful.

Okay, I suppose I am doing better than I could be at this point. I attribute this all to the new crazy pills. And I only had two migraines last week, which is monumental (Of course I have now jinxed that. No post till July, just watch). I have been at least making an effort to do the dishes and laundry. Only, I have had to wash a couple of loads twice since I occasionally (zip it, SD) forget them and they start getting funky.

I couldn't possibly do this without SugarDaddy, who is there to prop me up and take up the slack when I start to get overwhelmed. But honestly, I don't have time for this. I have boxes to go through, crap to get rid of, and clothes to sort. Our movers will be here in five weeks. And I don't want to move that crap again. YEESH!

Speaking of which...we are trying to ditch our old, sad couch. I love this couch, but, it's time. It's got holes worn in it and it's heavy (sofa sleeper). We are very close to our weight limit and the Air Force charges us a dollar for every pound we go over (I suppose that they charge everyone a dollar a pound, except, in this instance I really only care about ME...big surprise). So, every move comes down to, "Is this worth a dollar a pound?" And honestly, the couch is NOT worth eight zillion dollars (approximate measurement, my bathroom scale doesn't go that high...yet).

I also want to unload that butt-ugly entertainment center of ours. No, it is not worth a dollar per pound. However the corollary to that rule is "Can we afford to replace said offensive piece of crap after we have moved??" Well, the answer to that is, evidently, a resounding NO. At least not replace it with anything less offensive than the one we already have. *sigh*

All along, the plan was to just give away the damned thing and buy a new one as soon as we got to Texas. Until we bought that house. The house that has pushed us to our financial limit and has eliminated my budget for a maid (and I was so looking forward to her!). So, maybe if we can't sell the thing, sitting in my new hot tub will ease the burden. Care to join me?? You know that there will be margaritas in the fridge!

Fun Links for your Sunday

This guy either can't win for losing or can lose for winning. I haven't decided yet.

Okay, first, EWW! And second I'm not sure what is funnier, this guy's name or what he did (or didn't do!).

::running to laundry room to check pockets::

Whoopsie!! (or...the lesson those kids will never forget!)

Seriously, was one of these guys named Barney Fife??

Have a wonderful Sunday!!

Tears. Rolling. Down. Face.

I'm all out of funny for right now. If you are looking for funny, go read what Theresa shared yesterday over at This Mom Blogs. But understand that she is serious, finish chewing and swallowing anything you might be eating and refrain from drinking any beverages during the reading of the post. You could very well end up with a very messy screen or keyboard!

Then, go an and read as much as you can of her. She is one of the best writers I know!

Why are you still here??? GO! READ!! LAUGH!!

The Squeaky Wheel Gets the...Beer???

look! new haircut AND new glasses!

So, every once in a while, I get stuff in the mail from people for me to review. Like books, the new (and improved!) Swiffer, the Febreeze Notice!ables, and various other things. Usually, this stuff comes from Charlie. I'm not sure exactly what Charlie's job is, I'm assuming some sort of PR work. But Charlie is one of my favorite. people. ever.

One day a few weeks ago, I was reading over at Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda (if you don't read this site, you are crazy. Mir is so funny and dead-on!) and Mir mentioned that she had gotten a beer in the mail from Charlie. Being the whiny, smart ass that I am, I left this comment:

SHEESH! Charlie sends me baking tins and air fresheners. No beer. Why Charlie, why?? My baking would be much, much better with a beer. Seriously. And the Swiffer would definitely be more fun with a beer in the other hand.
Mir gets all the good stuff. *hmph*

See what I mean?! W H I N E. As it turns out, Charlie looks at the comments (how embarassing) and sent me the nicest email (hoping to get me to shut the hell up, I'm sure).

Buff, I caught your comment over at WouldaShoulda. Only reason I didn't contact you in the first place was because we have such a limited supply. But guess what... we have a handful left and...

...and I was happy! The beer arrived last Monday (a beer! in the mail!! YAY USPS!), which as you may remember was the day I was packing to take the plane ride from hell down to TEXAS! (I was blissfully unaware of the puking in my very near future). It came in a cool metal sided box that you could carry a bottle of wine (or soda, I suppose) in, a really neato bottle opener, and a CD Rom about the New Heineken Premium Light Lager Ale. So as I packed, I thought to myself, "Self? This packing stuff really sucks. A beer would make it better. Yes, a beer. Packing is much better with a beer than packing sans beer."

So off to the fridge I went and fetched myself the pretty green bottle that reminded me oh, so much of college and one particular Angel Flight sponsor at NatCon (Mrs. J knows what I'm talking about, "Too many greenies...")

So...how is the New Heineken Premium Light Lager Ale, you ask? Let's see, it tastes like, well, like light beer. I'm not a big light beer drinker. I have mentioned my beer of choice here before, but Heineken Light was pretty good for a light beer. Probably not my first choice, if I had my druthers, but I wouldn't turn it down if someone were giving it away at a party. (my favorite beer is FREE beer).

My boys were fascinated by the green bottle, "You dwinkin a GWEEN beeor, Mommy?" And the bottle was lovely...for a beer bottle. However, when I knocked it off the counter the next morning as we were headed out the door to meet Mike at the aero club (paging Mr. Murphy...clean up on Aisle 9), I didn't think it was quite so lovely. In fact, I'm almost certain that "lovely" was NOT one of the words that escaped my lips as I hastily cleaned up the mess.

So anyway, Charlie, when will you be handling the PR for Grey Goose, Jose Cuervo or Crown Royal? I'm your girl, there. All over that campaign. All. Over. It.

More pictures!

The pictures of our house are posted now. I just realized, however, that there are no pictures of the kitchen and no good shots of the patio. I'm trying to figure out how to download the ones from the Realtor's site without giving away too much. You know like exactly WHERE we will be living. I trust most of you, but there are a few that give me cause for concern. You know who you are!

Flickr Questions

Okay, the wedding photos are up over on my flickr account if you want to see them.

I have a gripe/question...WHY when you rotate the pictures to be vertical instead of horizontal, does it the show them as horizontal and all stretched out on the photo stream? I have enough body image issues without seeing myself like that.

I haven't looked at the Flickr badge over in my sidebar yet. I shudder to think of what I look like there!

HAPPY TAX DAY! (and other stuff)

We made it home safely. And without the need for airsick bags (or Burger King cups). I give most of the credit for this fact to SD's amazing flying skills, but I'm sure a great deal of the credit also goes to the weather and of course my new best friend, Dramamine.

The wedding was beautiful and absolutely perfect. A little windy, but that fact kept it from being ungodly hot, so I won't quibble. B2B (now known as Mrs. Jackalord) was radiant and the most relaxed bride I have ever known. She never really fweaked out, although when the rings weren't ready on Friday and it put us a good half hour behind schedule, I thought she might take someone's head off. (note to self: never tide in the car with a pissed off bride) She was stressed because she was going to be late to the rehearsal. Then I (the defender of bridal sanity) reminded her that nothing goes on without her and she could relax. So she did.

The rehearsal was great. The bride cried some when it came time to practice her Daddy giving her away, she started crying. So did her Daddy (we Texas girls love our daddies). SugarPlum was the flower girl and Bear was the ring bearer, although if you ask him, he was the "Ring Man." Never have there been two sweeter wedding attendants.

As an aside, if you told Bug that "Bear is the ring man," he would reply, "And my da pilot!" So during the rehearsal, when SugarPlum and Bear walked down the aisle, Bug noticed from across the golf course and started stomping and screaming "BUT MY DA PILOT!! MY DA PILOT!!" It was hilarious!

At the rehearsal dinner (held at Salt Grass Steakhouse, yum!) the bride's stress level was apparent when she drank not one, but TWO margaritas right there in front of her parents. This was a monumental occurrence, because when we took her out Thursday night, her mother asked if she had ever been "inebriated." T0 which she replied, "Of course not!"

The wedding day dawned bright and beautiful (I assume, I was in bed at dawn - only because SD got up with the boys). The bridesmaids were expected at the golf club at 1:00 to get our hair done and help the bride get ready. And, honestly, she was the picture of tranquility. We all got ready, got her into her gown and went down to take pictures. We came back up, our hair sporting the "wind-blown look."

The wedding was, as I said perfect. The groom (now Mr. Jackalord) looked in awe at his bride as she started down the aisle. And then his chin began to quiver as she approached. And that set me off of my first weepy moment of the day (but not my last, I assure you). They made it through the "giving away of the bride" but once she began her vows (and got choked up), I started to tear up again.

The reception was wonderful. Mrs. Jackalord even had the presence of mind to make me the go-to person for any questions form the DJ or anyone else so that she could enjoy herself. There were a few minor glitches, but nothing that effected the outcome. And, as they say, a good time was had by all.

We woke up bright and early Sunday morning, ate breakfast, packed up, had another gut-wrenching goodbye with Gray Gray and Gram and we were off. We made it home at about 5:00 and we were SO happy to be here!

I'll post a few pictures of the house and from the wedding later. Now, I MUST go to the grocery store if we have any hope of having supper tonight. Of course, since we bought the big house, it looks like beans and rice for the foreseeable future!

for those who know what I'm talking about, I hear that Picking up the Pieces will have a new post up soon.....

About that last one....

Happy Easter Y'all!!!

Buy a house............................................Check

Be Matronly........................................... Check

Fly back to Ohio ....................................ummmmm, seriously, I have to get back on that plane?

On the upside, I think I lost three pounds...

You know that game you played as a kid, or that your kids might do at school, the one with the parachute? You know, everyone grabs a corner of the parachute and you walk in a circle and watch in amazement as the parachute billows up and down and it's sooooo pretty? And then, someone tosses a ball or two in the middle and you them wave the parachute and the balls bounce all around, up and down, up and down, left and right, here and there, all over the place. You know what I'm talking about, right?

Okay, now imagine that that ball is an airplane. And you're in it. Up and down, up and down, to and fro, back and forth. Over and over and over for about an hour. Or a year.

Yeah. That pretty much describes my experience on the plane SD piloted for us from Ohio to TEXAS!! (still excited if a little queasy) on Tuesday. It honestly wasn't his fault. We flew through a big front and there was no way to avoid it.

We started out late (big surprise - three kids, never on time). SD finally got our stuff loaded and we set off. We took off, I kicked back, turned on my iPod and realized that we seemed to be going back down. This, in large part because the fuel cover had blown open and there was fuel pouring out of the airplane. Not the ideal flying situation. So, SD lands, gets us back over to the Aero Club and the mechanic guy takes a look and notices that the cover lock is broken. And all the ones that they have are too big. So they quickly "build" us one. And it works!

Crisis averted. For now.

So, we take off again & the kids and I all doze off. Well, SugarPlum doesn't because she was playing with the new Gameboy I got her. She has never had one and now I may never hear her voice again on a trip. Thank you, Nintendo!!!!!!

The flight goes pretty smoothly for the first leg. Towards the end, Bug had woken up and was just sitting there, sort of catatonic. No expression, no words, just sitting there. I was a little concerned, as was SD. Okay, I was a lot concerned, because this child rarely fails to display every emotion he has as he is having them. But he wouldn't respond to anything. I was really fweaked out. (as an aside, I am #1 in google search for "fweaked out") I was totally ready to call 911 when we got on the ground in Kentucky.

Then (after a very bumpy descent where I almost puked but did NOT), we landed. And as soon as SD opened the door to the airplane, Bug says, "That was a cool flight! When my grow up, my gonna be a pilot!" And then talked non stop about it for fifteen minutes! I guess he was just THAT into it. In his mind he was totally flying that airplane!

So, we get inside the little airport in Kentucky and the kids and I hang out while some guy takes SD to get us lunch at Burger King. I was still really queasy, but I really thought if I ate something (I had skipped breakfast) I would be okay. So, he got me a cheeseburger and a LARGE Sprite.

Once in the air again, I realized that perhaps the cheeseburger wasn't such a great idea. I quickly emptied out a Target bag and made use of it. Then I tied the handles up as securely as I could and put it under the seat, praying that it didn't leak.

Once we reached altitude, things smoothed out quite a bit and I was feeling much better. So much so that I was playing with the kids and even read some of my People and US magazinescopy of War and Peace that I brought along. But then........

Oh, yes, the bumps at the beginning? Nothing compared to the bumps now. I was praying praying, that I wouldn't throw up. No dice, it was coming. But where to put it?? All of the other bags in the plane had holes in them. Burger King cup to the rescue!! You would be amazed how well a cheeseburger fits into one of those cups. An hour after it was eaten. Of course, it's my personal belief that everything I had eaten in the past month was in there. It wasn't pretty.

SD asked at one point if I wanted to get there faster or smoother. Honestly, I just wanted off that plane, but I knew that if we landed, we'd just have to take off again. I said smoother. He says, "It should only be another two hours."

TWO HOURS????? Heaven help me.

When we finally landed in TEXAS!! I was literally green. But I can also truly say that I have never been so glad to see home again. Well, just to see solid ground again. SD told me that he would buy me a commercial ticket to fly back home if I wanted! I made him take the cup-o-puke to the trash for me. We went over to our old neighbors (HI ED!!) for dinner. They ordered pizza. I had crackers and Sprite. Mmmmmmm. Then we checked into our hotel and got everyone off to bed.

Wednesday was phase two of the house hunt. We've narrowed down the houses to two. Ironically, neither of which is the one I was so gung-ho about after the last trip. We will make our decision in the morning and hopefully put an offer in. If we get the one I really like, I see dial-up in my future. eeeek!

And then? I have to get back on that airplane to fly down for the wedding. Can I do it? With my good buddy Dramamine, I can. Pray for me, though. As much as I have been stressing over my weight gain, this is not how I want to lose it!

Another rambling post (written while I should have been packing)

As the wedding and our trip (my second) to TEXAS!! rapidly approaches, I realized that I needed to figure out what clothes to take. I was dismayed to discover that my ass has grown to such gargantuan dimensions that even my fat pants are too tight. Very disheartening.

At any rate, I had to have decent clothes to take with me to TEXAS!! (sorry, I'm excited!). I have been shopping all over for pants. Specifically, I was wanting some khaki and/or black capri pants. Because no way am I showing off my elephant thighs in shorts. As I browsed through the racks (at sizes I have never, ever had to look at, damn it), I realized that the capris were few and far between. They been replaced by these!

Gauchos, wide leg cropped pants, split skirt...I don't care what you call them they are butt ugly (Especially on a BIG butt...hahaha!). And I refuse to wear them. Except....the knit ones look awfully comfortable. But NO. I kept my resolve and kept looking until I found a pair of black pants and finally , at Target no less, I found a pair of khaki ones. But really, when will this insanity end??

I have all of these great, cute pants in my closet. That don't fit. Stupid thyroid. (Yes, it's all the thyroid's fault, not the Girl Scout cookies. Shut up.)

Oh, and did I mention that I got my hair cut and my eyebrows waxed?? Pictures forthcoming. LOVE my haircut. The eyebrows? Well, not exactly what I was going for, but once the blisters go away, I'm sure they will be fine. But that is a post unto itself.

So, today we leave for the Great State of TEXAS!! Me and my big, humongous capris. And my ever expanding ass. Oh, and the husband and kids (since he is the one flying the plane, I guess I should include him).We will hopefully find a house on Wednesday that we will actually buy. And then I'm off to be the matron of honor and chief defender of bridal sanity. Truly, I have my work cut out for me. She's not bridezilla (YET) but she is starting to fweak out. Wish me luck!!

Caption Contest

A little fun to kick off the weekend...leave me your caption in comments. I'll post my favorite and you will win...ummmm.....I'll get back to you on that!

And we have a winner!!
You all had wonderful captions, but the winner came in the first comment, from Cori.

"How does this compare to the "Rabbit" you've got hidden in your nightstand drawer?"

This falls under the heading of, "Aaaaallllll Righty then!!"

This guy is serious. He says he can treat anyone by reaching back in time to when an injury occurred and heal you. And he says he's not delusional. Of course, most delusional people say that, right?

Think he can reach back in time to when he lost his ever-loving mind??

Seriously, it's time for me to get the heck out of Ohio. Back to all the sane people in Texas. *snort*

EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY!!

So, tonight, SugarPlum had a soccer game at 6:00. Which meant that she had to be there by 5:45. Which meant that she had to leave here no later than 5:30. Which meant that she needed to eat supper at 5:00 because LORD the child dawdles - especially at mealtime and especially if she needs to eat quickly.

We usually eat at 6:00, no neither the boys nor I were ready for supper at 5:00. SugarPlum was elated because she got to have a frozen dinner, which is nearly unheard of around here. Later, the boys had leftovers. YAY for them.

Now, the kids are in bed and SD has gone to pick up Mexican food for us. My task is to prepare the margaritas. Not too challenging, since we keep a bottle of the pre-mixed Jose Cuervo Gold margaritas in the fridge at all times. (For those emergency tequila situations, dontcha know).

However...as I was pouring the margaritas into the salted glasses, I reached the bottom of the bottle. And there is no back up bottle in the pantry (yes, there usually is).

Guess where I'm going in the morning.

(Fortunately, there was just enough for us to both have one. Now, I'm trying to remember that rhyme from college: Beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before beer, you're in the clear. I should be okay with a Shiner Bock if I finish my margarita before my fajitas).

The post where I'm all "meh" (and I use a lot of parentheses)

Oh, HI!!

How are you? I can't believe that you came back. Remember me? I'm the lady that started this blog. And then apparently abandoned it this week. It's not you, it's me. Really.

I have had NO motivation to do anything lately, especially blog. I've barely been checking email. Last night I went to bed at 9:30.

Nine freaking thirty, people.

Take a look at some of my post times and you will see that I am never, ever in bed that early. I'm not sick, per se, just...meh.

Several weeks ago I underwent a major pharmaceutical overhaul. My doctor...excuse me, she's a CNP...my Primary Care Provider (love that HMO crap) discovered that my thyroid is just barely working. I also wanted to get off the Topamax. I was still having a couple of headaches a week, but that was not enough benefit to offset the risks, for me at least. PLUS, I could feel that dreaded depression creeping up on me again. And I wanted to take a look at my meds for that.

So, my PCP (!) put me on Synthroid for my thyroid, making sure to tell me that it would take a few weeks before I saw any real effects from it. I also got a beta blocker and a new SSRI. Woo hoo!

So after four weeks on the thyroid medicine, I was finally feeling great. My skin wasn't as dry, my nails were much less brittle (at least at the base - you can look at my nails and see the before and after). The lethargy had eased up some. My body was actually functioning normally for the first time in I can't tell you how long.

Given my family history, the doct- ahem, PCP- wanted to do an ultrasound of my thyroid. I had that the day before I left for Texas (!) (yes, I know I still haven't told you about that yet. Remember? MEH!) I got to Tommy and Peaches' house on Tuesday and Wednesday morning got a call from Nuclear Medicine saying that my PCP had ordered a thyroid scan and that in order to do it, I had to be off of the Synthroid for six weeks.

I decided that I needed to hear that from HER and find out exactly she found out from the ultrasound. As it turns out, I have a nodule on my thyroid. And, yes, she wants to have a scan done to give her a more definitive answer as to what exactly is going on with that little nodule.

Am I fweaked out? Yes, just a little. After consulting Dr. Google, I learned that most nodules are not cancer. But (always, a but, right?), my grandfather had thyroid cancer while I was pregnant with Bug, so I'm just a little fweaked out. Mostly, I'm frustrated about having to be off of the medicine for so long.

Also, after reading what Dr Google had to say, I'm a little dismayed that she didn't just order a fine needle biopsy (they take a tiny bit of tissue out with a needle (sorry for the visual, SD)), since it seems to be the quickest and most effective way of discerning benign/malignant tissue. Whatever. They don't pay me the big bucks to be a doctor (or nurse practitioner for that matter.).

So, now I have five more weeks to sit around and be meh. And to try not to yell or snap at my family. Because it's the hormone's fault, right? That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Comment for a cause

Have you been over to Genuine lately? He and his family have suffered a great loss and Jim is channeling his grief to help the family who lost their beautiful son. Go read about it here and comment please. Then say a prayer for them all.

Then go kiss your babies. Then? Kiss them again.

There is a reason I have that nickname

My new favorite shirt

found at Television Without Pity

This comment by JC made me laugh. I want a t-shirt with this on it even more than the one above! "Along these lines I saw a shirt that said 'Bad grammar makes me [sic]'"

Although, to be honest, it should really read, "Poor grammar."

For my friends who are native Texans...... and those who have lived there long enough to understand!

Anticipating the move back....

Happy Friday!!


Applies to each person as they enter Texas. Learn & remember:
(East Coast and California-types pay particular attention! )

1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.

2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road." I drive a pickup truck because I want to.
No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.

3. They are cattle & oil wells. That's what they smell like that to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-20 and I-10 go east and west, I-35 goes north and south.
Pick one.

4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed.
We have $250,000 cotton strippers that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.

6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of doves are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.

7. Yeah, we eat catfish & crawfish. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.

8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.

10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.

11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and Picante Sauce! ;

Oh, yeah.... We don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat... It AIN'T REAL CHILI!! Chili was born and bred in San Antonio.... and real chili never met a tomato!

12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

13. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.

14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -- it spooks the fish.

15. Colleges? Try Texas Tech, Texas A&M or University of Texas. They come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays. (I can't necessarily guarantee that for University of Texas folks)

16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, than any other state, so "Don't Mess with Texas," If you do, you will get whipped by the best.

17. Always remember what our great governor Sam Houston once said:

"Texas can make it without the United States, but the United States can't make it without Texas!"

Shhhhh. Don't tell SugarDaddy!

The potty training thing has been going.....well....you know. He's a stubborn little guy. I'm looking for motivators.

So today, we were at Meijer, looking at the underwear again. I was hoping that they wouldn't have the same selection as Target. But damn if they didn't.

And well, I caved.

So if you see my cute little Bug, try not to laugh too hard. He could very well have on the Madagascar ones. But somehow, I doubt it.

Still snuggling...

My favorite phrase, uttered at least ten times a day by Bear:

"Mommy, I very missed you while you was gone!"

And I very missed him, too.

It's here! It's here!!

Okay, first off, I am typing this on my NEW LAPTOP!! WOO HOO!! My new Dell Inspirion 6000 finally made it here yesterday. It has been quite an ordeal to get it here.

SD ordered the computer through the Base Exchange catalog. It was infinitely cheaper that way. It was supposed to be here the day before Bear's surgery. We cut them some slack and finally called that Thursday to say WTF???

Evidently, Dell had shipped my computer to our old address in Texas. The people living in our old house are strange enough (according to our old neighbors) that I didn't think that they would hold onto it until I got there. I know we changed the address on the BX website, so I'm not sure how that happened. And the BX people were oh so helpful. They basically said that since it had shipped, there was nothing they could do about it. Even though it was their fault that it went to the wrong address. Grrrrrrrrrrrr. I was very grouchy about this. Plus, I had PMS. You do the math.

So SD called Dell they actually were helpful - to a point. The lady he spoke to at UPS told him that the laptop was still in Texas, but that it would be here by Friday. Friday came & went and no computer. We got on the UPS tracking site and as of Sunday, the box was in Missouri. Not looking good for the home team.

Monday morning it was in Kentucky. Damn.

I was leaving Tuesday and I was really hoping to have my new computer. I didn't want to take my poor, sad hillbilly laptop with its cracked screen and missing keys on my trip. So embarrassing. Ultimately though, Bubba Ray Laptop and I were off for Texas Tuesday morning.

Tuesday evening, my computer arrived. But we all saw THAT coming, didn't we?

Only, when SD took it out of the box, he noticed that it didn't sit level. The bottom was warped. Were the laptop gods conspiring against me??? A quick call to Ahmed at Dell Customer Support and another laptop was on its way. They said it would be here Wednesday. Imagine my surprise and delight when it arrived Monday! I could be bitter, but I choose to be happy to have it. Dell's customer support was great! And SD already has all of my goodies loaded on the new computer. All my favorites and all of my pictures. He's a pretty handy guy to have around, I'll tell ya!

So, now maybe you will get to hear all about my trip. Tomorrow, though. I've still got some snuggling to catch up on with my SugarBabies!

There's no place like home!

I made it home! Things were so crazy busy the whole time I was with my friend. But crazy in a good way. You know, the way they can only be with one of your very best friends.

If you know her, ask B2B how oatmeal is grown. No, on second thought, don't. Evidently, nobody else has thought that was as funny as we do.

SugarBear is doing much, much better. He missed his mommy, but Daddy did a bang up job of taking care of him. And everyone else, for that matter. I even came home to a clean house. Including laundry! Seriously.

But I am tired. So I should probably go to sleep. In MY bed. Beautiful words, those.

Catch you all tomorrow.

Thought for the day...

Back to God's Country

Sorry for the lack of posting. I'm in TEXAS!! right now.

Staying with our old......ahem......former neighbors. Our FAVORITE NEIGHBORS EVER (hi ED!). Only problem? They have dial up. And dirt floors. And no indoor plumbing. I'll be on social security before this ever posts. Seriously.

Looked at houses all day. Narrowed the field, but will probably have to come back again next month.

More tomorrow when I am back in civilization. And a DSL connection.

Or was it Baa Baa Black Sheep?

Exchange between Bug and Mommy last night regarding his Fisher Price crib aquarium thing:


Bug: I want to hear Twinkle Star!!

Mommy: It is playing Twinkle Star.

Bug: No, no, no! That's The ABC song!



**Okay, since Contrary brought it up, raise your hand if you had to sing all three songs to yourself just now to realize that they all have the same tune. Own up!***

*yawn* (and other stuff)

So sorry I haven't posted since Wednesday. The whole post-op kid thing has worn me down. He's doing okay....now. He says that his throat only hurts a little. We have kept him doped up on codeine pretty much 'round the clock though, so I'm sure that's got a lot to do with it.

Thursday was terrible. He was hurting and not at all pleased about it. He didn't want to drink, didn't want to eat, didn't want to take medicine or do anything but whine. Which is totally understandable. But it gets old fast.

I think he has consumed his weight in ice cream over the last three days.

He is such a little trouper, though. He has been sleeping with me since the surgery and, except for the first night, has been very sweet. Tonight it's back to his own bed though. And of course we picked this weekend to move Bug out of the crib. He is NOT pleased! So tonight should be loaded with fun.

Today, my challenge has been to keep my four year old bundle of energy calm and low-key. Easier said than done. He really wants to run around. I bought a bunch of stuff for SD to do with him next week: play-doh, Crayola Color Wonder finger paints and markers, a Lego fire station to put together. And, on the off chance that it warms up some while I am gone, I bought shovels and pails for the boys to use in the sandbox.

As it looks right now, though, it is supposed to snow Tuesday. Yes, that is the first day of Spring. And, coincidentally, the day I am supposed to leave for my trip. Fun.

Guess who is picking me up from the airport. PEACHES! I am so excited. I get to spend the night at her and Tommy's home. (Although, Tommy will conveniently be out of the country. Coincidence? You decide.) And I'll get to meet Scytheboy and see the man room!! Woo Hoo! Then she is taking me the next day to rent a car & I am going house hunting at our next base. Wish me luck!

For now though, I am trying to convince Bear to watch another movie and calm the hell down already. Popsicle, anyone??

SugarBear Goes to the Hostpital

8:15~ They just took Bear back to do the surgery. He took some Versed about ten minutes before they took him and he was a little loopy. He didn’t say much. Just looked around with this “Duuuuude!” look on his face. We asked him is he felt like Alex the Lion from Madagascar.

All got a pretty good night’s sleep, surprisingly enough. Bug woke us up about ten minutes before I planned to get up. (How does he do that??) So, I got up, made myself some oatmeal and a cup of tea so that I didn’t have to eat in front of him. That would have been mean, you know?

The first thing Bear said when I woke him was, "I can't have any water??" Then he tried to talk me into letting him have some yogurt. His reasoning was, it's not water!

We got to the hospital on time (miracle of miracles!!) and got checked in quickly. The other little boy in the room was watching The Tigger Movie which was cool with Bear. We found out that Bear is second in line for surgery, just behind this little boy in our room. That boy is just getting tubes in his ears, so his procedure shouldn’t take long.

The hospital staff have each asked me the same set of questions about a thousand times. I know why they do this – to make sure everything is right – but it gets old fast. I feel like wearing a sign around my neck with all of the information on it.

Goob and CMHL reminded me to ask for some “anti-pukey” drugs to be administered before he wakes up. Hopefully, they will help. I can’t imagine throwing up after having surgery on my throat. Even the thought of it is painful!! ::shudders::

So I am sitting here in the waiting room now, alternating between playing on my laptop and reading Jen’s book, Bitter is the New Black. It is fantastic so far. Wickedly funny. A very good distraction for a fweaked out mommy!

There is a lady here in the waiting room who feels the need to give us her life history. All the surgeries she has had, her husband has had and, as a bonus, all the details of her son’s suicide attempt. I’m trying to look busy and avoid eye contact. I understand that she is nervous and needs to talk, but I don’t feel like playing therapist this morning.



9:00~ The doctor came and told us that everything went really well. He could tell that Bear's tonsils had suffered through many infections. I’m glad we did this. I had strep soooo many times when I was little. I don’t want him to have to suffer like I did. Hopefully this will help. Strep is something that you just don't outgrow!

And his ears are good as well. He had been having such trouble hearing. And he's only ever had maybe three ear infections in his life. I'm really praying that this will help his hearing.

9:10~ This woman will not shut up!! And now she has several other people in the waiting area all keyed up and they are over-sharing as well. I just keep trying to look busy.

9:15~ Finally I can go back and see my Bear. And boy is he pissed! He also sounds really croupy which is concerning me. His pulse/ox is about 94 at first. So we wait and listen. The nurse actually encourages me to climb into bed with him and hold him so that he will feel safe and calm down easier. I have to sing to him, but finally he starts to calm down. Poor little guy. He woke up feeling weirder that he has ever felt and Mommy wasn’t there. Of course he was pissed off and crying!

His pulse/ox keeps falling and he still sounds a little croupy, so Bear gets a breathing treatment. That seemed to help. He woke up some. But he is still pretty spacey. He said he wanted a popsicle, but he just sits there holding it.


10:00~ Bear gets moved back to his room. We watch The Tigger Movie again. He eats a couple of things of Jell-O, two popsicles and drinks plenty of water and apple juice. He starts to perk up some, but he still wants Mommy to hold him. I even got to ride on the bed with him as they moved him!! Wheee!!

11:30~ SD comes back from checking on Bug and brings me lunch. We are now watching The Rescuers. I remember seeing it at the theater when I was a kid. I had forgotten that Bob Newhart was Bernard!! Okay, so really Bear is watching the movie and I am reading more of my book. It is hilarious!!

12:30~ They finally come and take Bear’s IV out and we are getting ready to go.

1:00~ DISCHARGED!! Bear insists on walking out. No wheelchair for him! Once we are in the car and bucked up Bear asks, “When we get home, I can go potty??” Well, of course he needs to potty! After all that fluid they pumped into him plus all that he has had to eat and drink, I’ll bet he needs to potty!

We pull in the garage and Bear says, “Let me get out on Bug’s side. I need to go potty weally bad!!” And he went straight to the bathroom and peed for three days.

Then we got him settled on the couch and he watched Toy Story 2 while he ate popsicles. Bug got a popsicle, too, because how unfair is that to have to sit and watch your brother eat popsicles?! He also ate some more Jell-o and drank some water. He's mad that he can't eat real food. Obviously he isn't feeling too much pain. That comes tomorrow. Thank heaven for Tylenol 3.

Right now, he's mad because he wants to play & he can't. It's gonna be a long two weeks. Good news for me? I get to leave town next Tuesday for five days!! Pray for SugarDaddy!


Thank you so much for all of your prayers and good thoughts. I believe that they played a big role in everything going as well as it did.

Biting my nails a little

Tomorrow morning (Wednesday), at 6:30, I am taking my sweet SugarBear to the hospital. He is getting tubes in his ears and having his tonsils and adenoids removed.

I know that they do this surgery a hundred times a day. I know that this is really no big deal and that he will be fine.

But, I also know that my little boy is a little fweaked out. He asked me if it's "gonna hurt when they cut those things outa my froat?" I told him that he would be asleep when they did the actual cutting out of those things. But that it would probably hurt some when he woke up and that he would feel pretty crummy for several days. BUT!!! He will get to eat popsicles and ice cream and pudding and jello! So, there is a silver lining.

I must say that I am a little fweaked out myself. Things go wrong. Anytime there is anaesthesia, there is a chance that things can go wrong. That and I hate that my Bear is going to be hurting. I know, I know. In the long run, he will be better and hurt less. But, damn, I hate the short run!!

So....if you don't mind...if you are so inclined, could you say a little prayer for my SugarBear? And maybe his mommy, too.

Giving new meaning to the $100 hamburger...

Now with pictures!!!!!

So, yes, I was a bad, bad blogger this weekend. I spent very little time online. And even less time posting (obviously)! Part of this was because my mouse quit working. It would move around and point, but it wouldn't left click. So it was useless. Luckily, I was able to get to Best Buy last night and buy this mouse. I was excited because it is rechargeable and hopefully I won't use so many batteries! One problem...it only works when it's attached to the USB cable. So that sort of takes away from the whole "wireless" aspect of it. Looks like I'll be making another trip back to Best Buy tomorrow!

And the thing is, I had so much to post about!!

Next month we are all flying to my best friend's wedding. (Okay, you're not going with us. There isn't enough room. Sorry.) And instead of going on an airline, SD is flying us! All right, yes, I'm a little apprehensive about this. The first time I flew with him, I came very close to losing my lunch. However, I trust him and this will be easier than flying with all three kids, changing planes, keeping the boys from kicking the seat in front of us and pissing off that guy....you get the picture. I'll buy some SeaBands and Dramamine and I'll be fine.

But, we needed to do a little "test flight" to see how the kids reacted. SugarPlum and Bear have both flown with SD before, but Bug hasn't. And honestly I haven't in nearly seven years. So we needed to go somewhere that wasn't too far away. About an hour or less of flying time. And I thought, "Who can we go see??" Because it would be a shame to fly somewhere and not get to see someone.

We were afraid that we weren't going to get to go anywhere because we woke up Saturday to thunderstorms. But finally those cleared up and we headed out after naptime. Bug was soooo excited. He paced around the plane. He tried to climb in. Once we were in the plane he kept saying, "I want to go up."

And you should have seen his face once we finally were "up." It was priceless.

Bear got to ride up front and help Daddy fly. He thought that was great fun. And then he fell asleep. Bug got to wear the extra headset for the rest of the flight. He entertained Daddy with his versions of Twinkle Twinkle and Baby Galuga.

So who did we see? Mamacita!!! Who is only one of my HEROES!!!! (wanna know why? read this.) You know you are jealous. We met her at Steak and Shake and we were like half an hour late but she was still there! I was so relieved. And yes, she is just as wonderful as you imagined she would be. My kids loved her. Especially SugarPlum. She kept us giggling with stories about her mom. And her kids. I hope that I will get to spend time with her again, because honestly she is magnificent! I wanted to stay all night. But we needed to get home before dark. And SD was getting restless. So we said our goodbyes, took a couple of pictures (which didn't turn out so well, so I'm waiting to get her permission to post!) and we were off. (Mamacita sent me the picture from her camera and it is much better!) Isn't she lovely?!

Once we were back in the plane, SugarPlum sat up front. I sat in back and Bear sat in the middle with Bug. And the heater didn't work. I was well chilled by the time we landed.

So, all in all, it was a good flight! Looks like we will be flying down to the wedding. We may even fly up to our next base for a little house hunting!! We shall see how ambitious we get.


**there would have been pictures with this post, only Blogger is being cranky. thus, so am I.**
woo hoo! Blogger is better!! hope you like the pix!

A Pain I Cannot Imagine

I look at my kids and I thank God every day for them. I recently attended the first birthday party for a friend's daughter whom they adopted a year ago. I cannot imagine my life without my kids or even the children of my friends whom I love nearly as my own.

Karin has been sharing with her readers the experience of some friends who were adopting a baby boy. Today, these dear people found out that they had to give their baby boy back to the birth mother. You can read more here.

But please, keep these people, all of those involved, in your thoughts and prayers. There are so many hearts breaking tonight.

If you ask my kids, you might get a different story

You Are 20% Evil

You are good. So good, that you make evil people squirm. Just remember, you may need to turn to the dark side to get what you want!

How Evil Are You?



I stole this from The Goober Queen. Evidently, I am the Anti-Goob.

It's never what you think, is it?

To tell you the truth I have been hesitant to blog about this topic. I mentioned it once several months ago and really nothing came of it. It was a fanciful day for Bug that I took as more than it was. But now? Well, now he seems a little more serious. And well, so am I.

I am speaking ,of course, of potty training. A tried and true hotbed issue among mommy bloggers (yes, I wear my badge proudly!). I've read all the books. I know all the theories. I know that some people train their kids starting from birth and that others, well, don't. I have friends who have used the "Potty Train Your Child in a Day" method with great success. Frankly, I am much too lazy for that.

But, when Bug decided a few days ago that he wanted to wear "Unnerwear! No diaper!" I took it as a good sign. I was on board. He didn't have but about four pairs of underwear. Bear wasn't potty trained until about a year ago, so there are no hand-me-downs. (But really, hand me down underwear? Ew.) So, it was off to Target for some "unnerwear." As if we'd go someplace else.

We were standing there, looking at all of the toddler underwear and I am extolling the merits of the various designs as Bug shoots them down one by one.

Me: Look! There's Elmo underwear!

Bug: My not yike Elmo unnerwear.

Me: Ooooh! Madagascar underwear! I see Alex and Marty and MELMAN!

Bug: Nooooooo....no Melman unnerwear.

Me: Bob the Builder? Thomas the Train? Baseballs?

Bug: No. No. No. I want da horse unnerwear.

Me: Horse underwear? (scanning the racks) I don't see any horse und....do you mean these?

Bug: (BIG smile) yeah! Horse unnerwear!

Me: These My Little Pony pan*ties? They are for girls, sweetie.

Bug: My yike horse unnerwear! My want horse unnerwear!

Me:...................Let's go see what underwear is in the bigger boys section!


No, I didn't buy him the My Little Pony pan*ties. But don't think I didn't consider it. And don't think I haven't ruled it out if he needs a little extra motivation. I'm not proud.

And no Brokeback jokes, Ben!

Here's one that's great for the old ego....

I come up #2 in a search for Mommy's got huge ass.


I've suddenly got some extra Girl Scout cookies for sale in case anyone is interested.

Swiffer Madness

SO, the days here in Candyland have been heady with excitement. Heady, I tell you. (Please, bear in mind that excitement is subjective.)

The other day, Bug comes to tell me that "the 'nother one UPS (pronounced "ups") guy is here!!!" Puzzled, I looked out the window to see the FexEx truck at the curb and the FedEx lady knocking on my door. Still confused, I accepted the package, wondering what on earth I could have ordered & forgotten about. Me & Amazon, we're like *this* but this package was NOT from Amazon. Nor was it one of the many aprons I have "won" on eBay. (SD, you didn't just read that)

Once we got it back inside & opened all three kids were thrilled to see sticks!! coming out of the box. Someone must really love them to send them these metal sticks! And look! They snap together and can make swords! Cool!! We can be like Star Wars now and....AW, MOM!

I finally got all of the sticks! back together & showed them that it was actually the new (and improved!) Swiffer Sweeper. You would have thought it was Christmas or something. Well, no, that's not accurate. At Christmas each child gets presents of his or her own. Now, this...this was more like some cutthroat competition with the new (and improved!) Swiffer Sweeper as its prize!


Bear: Ooooooh! I wanna do the new Swiffer!

Bug: I sweep! I sweep!

SugarPlum: Mom? Can I do it? Please? You said I could, before. Remember?

(This is true. Six weeks ago, before the Pampered Chef party, I told her that she could Swiffer the floors for me if she got her room cleaned.)

So I told them that whoever picked up the most toys downstairs in the family room got to Swiffer first.

What sort of twisted, ironic world do I live in where the children are begging me to sweep the kitchen and ask for vacuum cleaners for their birthdays??

Needless to say, none of the toys were picked up. So the new (and improved!) Swiffer Sweeper was unceremoniously placed atop the extra cabinet in the kitchen as to limit access to the sticks! and was forgotten for several days.

Finally, we had several days of not sucky weather and my kitchen floor was showing the effects of children running in and out the back door eleventy thousand times. (Not at all the effects of not being mopped or barely even swept in over a month. Shut up.) It was then that I remembered the new (and improved!) Swiffer Sweeper waiting patiently up there on the top of the extra cabinet.

Whee!

The new handle is...greener and...knobbier. The wet cloth things are cool. And y'all, they have a scrubber strip. Yes, it will get the scuff marks up AND that crap that is stuck to the floor that you would otherwise have to go grab the scrubby thing out of the sink and bend over and scrub off the floor. Yes, the scrubby strip thing is very cool, except...you know how the Swiffer Sweeper's head is all swivel-ly? Which, really, is part of the appeal, right? Because then you can get into odd corners and places. Well, it's swivel-y-ness (I'm a fount of new, obnoxious words today!) makes it difficult to flip the sweeper head over to the scrubby strip part. On the box, it shows how you just tip it to the end and flip it over, but in real life? You have to flip the stick thing up and turn the head over to the scrubby strip part with your hand. But it scrubs well, whenever you need it to and you can get it flipped over.

All in all? I like the new (and improved!) Swiffer. Makes my life easier. Especially once I train the munchkins in how to use it. I also realized that I can remove one (or more) of the sticks! and make the thing shorter and more child friendly. Or more glass-in-my-kitchen friendly, depending on your point of view.

Now, if the weather would just warm up again, I could get all this laundry folded.

I have a hidden talent! Who knew?!

Stolen from Peaches (again!)

Your Hidden Talent

Your natural talent is interpersonal relations and dealing with people. You communicate well and are able to bring disparate groups together. Your calming presence helps everything go more smoothly. People crave your praise and complements.

What's Your Hidden Talent?

Current Events...

Germ-a-palooza!

Ugh.

Back to the land of the living.

Bear and SugarPlum both had a touch of stomach virus on Monday. SugarPlum complained of nausea first thing after she woke up and since she isn't one to fake it, I decided to let her stay home. She never threw up, but she slept most of the day which is very unlike her. I sent Bear to school though, because he is "sick" at least twice a week. So you know he puked at school, right? Three times. Poor guy. Mother. of. the. Year.

But he only threw up at school, so I had to go and brag to some friends that this round wasn't so bad, since nobody threw up at home. Will I never learn???

Yesterday, I got up and made my tea, got SugarPlum's hair fixed & got her out the door, and got the boys' downstairs to play. Bear was staying home an extra day because he was complaining about his ear & had a dr. appt. I had a friend coming to watch Bug.

Shortly after SD left, I started feeling queasy. Then the bathroom parade began. (I'll spare you the gory details.) I sat curled in a ball on the couch between trips. I didn't know how I was going to get Bear to the pediatric clinic, but I got us dressed. I called SD's cell, even though I knew he was in class. He was planning to go to Ash Wednesday Mass, but at this point I really needed him to come home and take Bear. Which he did. Smart man.

With them gone, I got Bug down for his nap and laid myself down. I vaguely remember SD calling and saying that the clinic was running an hour behind. Then I remember him calling to say that they were at lunch and did I want him to pick me up something from Starbucks? Ummmm that would be NOOOOOOOOO! Since I couldn't keep water down, I didn't think a CDL would be in my best interest. I don't think he realized how sick I was until then.

I slept until he had to go back to class at 2:30. While he was gone, I realized it was sunny! And warm! Okay...not cold!! outside, and shoved the boys out the door. SugarPlum started to ask if her friend N. could come over. Then, noticing the greenish tint to my skin, decided that perhaps it would be better to ask if she could go play at N's house. Of course I was all for that.

SD found me curled in a ball in the rocking chair when he got home at 4:30. He suggested that I go back to bed. That was the best idea I had heard all day. I stayed there (except for a couple of trips to the bathroom) until Bear came in at 7:30 to ask me to read him his bedtime story and sing to him. Only Mommy will do, you know. (okay, yes, this made me a little happy!)

I decided I might feel good enough to come downstairs, if only to get some migraine medicine because the left side of my head was pounding!! Then I decided I'd check my email. And maybe eat some crackers and drink some Sprite. That lasted about an hour at the most. The crackers & Sprite didn't last long and I was back in bed by 9:30. I slept all night. I didn't even watch Project Runway. This is why God made TiVo.

Whatever that virus was, it was a bitch and I hope we never see it again! I am feeling much better today, although not 100%. I'm on a tea and toast diet today. I did start a load of laundry and go through my sweaters to get rid of some of them. But that pretty much wore me out.

Tonight we have the Brownie fashion show at Limited, Too. This should be interesting. Overpriced clothes to make your nine year old look like a tramp! Come one come all!

Better take my Maalox.